California McMillans

Soda

2012-01-28T07:44:00.000-08:00

Tyler was finally able to get some fluids. His lactate continued to rise, despite the decrease in blood sugar from the insulin infusion. Jeff, the nurse, and I decided that the one to correctly guess the lactate levels would get to give Tyler a popsicle.

Well, we were all wrong because the numbers were way high. Then, Jeff, the attending who understands that medicine involves the occasional obtuse solution, said, "These are just numbers. Look at him. He's doing fine. He's probably dried out, I mean, look at his CVP--it's four. Give him some fluids." So Tyler got to drink and his numbers improved. Then he got a popsicle which made him happy, and then the old Tyler was back: "I don't WANT ORANGE! I WANT A BLUE POPSICLE!"

At about midnight, Heidi recommended I go to sleep. The nurse was going to stop his fentanyl drip and just give him morphine prn, which should help him sleep. I turned the chair into a bed and closed my eyes. Heidi went to sleep in some women-only bunk bed room. Tyler was up pretty regularly, asking for soda, until about 3:30 this morning. His art line failed and they had to get blood from his finger, but it's all kind of a haze now.

The nurses' shift change is at seven, so when they started discussing Tyler, one of them said, "It was a rough night." I sat up in my bed to listen, and they saw me and closed the door. So I stood up and opened the door to listen. It's interesting how they talk differently when the parents are around. Still, they were discussing the case and said that Tyler had to be defibrillated five times in the OR. Why didn't they tell us that yesterday? They probably worry that we'd worry.

I'm tired. Tyler is in pain when he's awake. It is too early to say we're out of the woods. He has some leads connected to an extra-corporeal pacemaker that occasionally has to fire. Right now, every beat is regulated by the pacemaker. No one can say for sure whether the junctional rhythm will turn back into sinus rhythm. If not, they can install a subcutaneous pacemaker, but we'll see.

Thanks for your comments on the blog and facebook. People want to know how to help. Your prayers help, and Heidi could use some company at the hospital (even though she'll never ask for it). I'm going home today because it's Scott's birthday and I want to spend some time with him.

Ice chips and hot chocolate

2012-01-27T21:00:00.000-08:00

Tyler has been fussy for the past five hours. All he wanted was water. The nurses didn't want to give him any fluids because it would stress his heart. The nurses and doctors listened to him moan--he'd plead with them, saying, "Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease, can I have some wa wa?"

I put in my ear plugs, and when I had had enough, I approached the nurse and doctor and said, "He's stressed because he's thirsty. You gotta intervene."

They were also concerned at Tyler's rising lactate levels, a sign of stress. Sometimes, the lactate is high because of increased blood glucose and administering some insulin can lower it. However, sometimes the lactate is high because the heart is under duress, in which case insulin would be ineffective and they'd have to intubate him.

I said, "I know what the books say. What does your gut say?" Tyler cried for ice chips and hot chocolate for several hours. Finally, one of the physicians said, "Give him some ice chips." Immediately, he calmed down and fell asleep. He sleeps for like one minute, then wakes up and asks for more ice chips. He's been sleeping for the past two or three minutes, so we might go to the cafe and get some din-din.

Oh, he just woke up.

Fontan

2012-01-27T17:53:00.000-08:00

Tyler presented to the OR at seven this morning. They gave him some oral versed and then Heidi and I took a stroll through golden gate park. The team had anticipated a 4-6 hour surgery. At 3:00 Heidi and I started getting nervous. They said they would call to update us on the surgery, but no. finally, we saw Tyler's bed rolling down the hall.

Tony came to talk to us and began speaking to me in Spanish. Then, he told us that the surgery went well and said, "He went under great. Then there was a problem. When I opened the sternum, his heart was fused to the bone. So I started to dissect it and it started to bleed. I put him on bypass and had to cannulate him through his neck....His valve regurgitation was on the lower end of mild, and I thought that was really good, considering that several months ago he had moderate... His heart function looked good. The Fontan pressures were about eight when he first came off, now they're about thirteen (anything below 15 is good). His rhythm was normal sinus for I'd say 95% of the time. And then he started waking up, he developed a junctional rhythm, I don't think that's terribly unusual, the fact that he had sinus rhythm is a good sign...The valve is better than it was several months ago...we put in a 20 mm gore tex tube...his pulmonary arteries look pretty good...short of the adherence of the heart to the back of the sternum,"

Heidi: Is that common?

Tony: You know, the number of times I've had to cannulate a neck, because the heart was stuck to the sternum (pause),

Danny: You can count on one hand?

Tony: Yeah, yeah.

Heidi: So why did that happen?

Tony: It's just the previous operations, and the conduit, and the scarring, it's just, the heart, it was fused to the bone. And I didn't peel the heart off the bone, what I had to do is take a chunk of bone off the chest wall...One of the worries is when you're dissecting the heart off the sternum, and you get into it, is that air can enter and...be ejected into the brain...but we controlled it, dissected everything, put him on bypass...supported his circulation, and everything was under perfect control, dissected everything out, fixed the hole, did the Fontan, took him off, close this, close that. He's extubated.

Tony, Heidi and I went in to see Tyler and he was agitated. I knew he was doing well when he started trying to rip off his nasal cannula. The nurses were worried, though. They kept wanting to give him drugs and I was like, "He wants a drink. Give the man some water." The nurses didn't want to, though. Then Jeff came in and said, "Better the water than Versed and Fentanyl."

I agreed with that. After one of the nurses left, Jeff said, "Let's lower his prn infusions."

That's all I feel like posting for now. They aren't totally stoked about how stable he is, but I think he is stable because he's complaining, just like before. He's like, "Mommy! GET ME A DRINK RIGHT NOW!" Eh, anyway.

Thanks for the texts and stuff. I don't feel like entertaining any phone conversations right now, though.

Day two

2012-01-26T20:42:00.000-08:00

Tyler had a pretty good day. He sat patiently for an echo and Tony was pleased with his AV valve, saying that the meds must have really helped. That, or the hand of the Lord is evident. Heidi called me at school and said that Tony promised that the surgery would happen. I said, "He promised?" And Heidi said, "He said he would do everything in his power to make the surgery happen."

Several of you have asked if the surgery is on for sure. Medicine is not like the Honda motorcycle factory in Japan, where they assemble one bike every 3600 seconds. Rather, medicine deals with human beings and each case is different. In a hospital setting, emergency cases may present higher priority and they may bump Tyler. You must understand that doctors make decisions based on what they feel is best for the patient with the knowledge they have at the moment.

Tyler is currently the first case, so as far as we know, he'll present to the OR tomorrow at 7:00 Pacific time.

Many people have called to wish Tyler well and say that they will pray for him. We appreciate that. Today, I was talking with some people about Tyler's diagnosis and they said they were sorry. I said, "We feel fortunate to have him in our lives. They encouraged us to abort him and we've had four good years with him."

Somebody else said, "I was feeling sorry for myself because of this and that, and then I thought of you guys and what you're going through. Suddenly, my life doesn't seem so hard." And I said, "We have a good life. We have been through some hard times but we are happy." Heidi and I are pretty much at peace with the diagnosis of the condo, realizing that it's just money. We are at peace with Tyler's surgery. A big component of our peace is that we realize that God has power over the outcome of this surgery and we recognize the big picture. Now I'm going to brush my teeth and floss and try to sleep on the hide-a-bed in 6 long.

He's in!

2012-01-26T08:07:00.000-08:00

Tyler went to UCSF yesterday and got connected to milrinone. I rode the VFR to SF after work and Tyler was in good spirits. He even offered me a cookie. Heidi slept in a chair-bed alongside Tyler and I got a hide-a-bed in 6-long. The person to my right was snoring pretty loudly and occasionally cried out, and there was a big diesel truck that seemed to run all night, but I slept well from 5-6.

We are still programmed for surgery tomorrow, so cross your fingers! Thanks for your prayers.

Diapers and Lasix

2012-01-21T21:14:00.001-08:00

Heart moms....I just read on someones blog that insurance is covering her sons diapers after age 3 since he is on LASIX. Wish I knew that sooner. Hope it helps.

2012...Here We Come

2012-01-13T12:10:00.001-08:00

First, I can't believe it is 2012....CRAZY!! Life gets busier and times goes faster. I remember when a summer seemed like FOREVER and now it seems like a short little break.

There are so many things that I need to work on and want to do.
Keeping the house clean and uncluttered. I like throwing things away which I am proud of. Plan and prepare meals. Why isn't that as easy as it seems? Excercise....haven't done that in about 6 years and it is a resolution every year. Work on my book. Family History. Be patient. Make my baby a napper. Quality one on one time with my hubby and the kids. That sounds good for now.

Feeling MUCH better since my anxiety weeks! Whew. Soooo Sooo Grateful. We all have our various trials in life. I just couldn't live with that.

Anxiety

2012-01-12T14:12:00.000-08:00

Have you ever had anxiety? Full blown anxiety--the type that you are worried over things that is simply irrational to worry about. Or maybe rational, but way out of hand. Logically they will all work out, there are solutions, they aren't that big of a deal to spend your day worrying, but you just can't stop your body's emotions and you aren't functioning like a normal human being because of it. You are emotionally and physically affected. It is the craziest thing. I am usually a pretty happy, optimistic, life will be alright kind of person. Don't get me wrong, I have worries and bad moments but they are usually not that big of a deal. Well, I was not my normal self these past two to three weeks. They were HORRIBLE. I had anxiety.

Have you watched the Bachelor? Due to totally different reasons I became one of those girls. Not the nice, drama- free ones I like. I was the couldn't stop crying over nothing, one of the crazy ones. A sad, sad sight.

I was tired and couldn't focus on anything but my worries. I wanted to avoid everything, sleep and yet I had to take care of children. I would periodically say to myself, "Am I going to make it though," and respond, "yes, I will."

I recognize it was a blessing that I don't usually feel this way. I gained some major empathy for others who deal with anxiety and depression. In my opinion emotional illness is far worse than physical. And I know my two to three week experience and probably level of anxiety was nothing and short lived compared to many.

My mom has had ups and downs with the emotions of cancer and chemo which is totally understandable. I was having a hard time relating. I would tell her to just try to be happy, the chemo seems to be working, make the most of the day, etc etc. It wasn't working. I am obviously no therapist. So you guessed it, I prayed that I would know how to help her and WHAM! I experienced a taste of what it is like to not just wake up and be happy and or be optimistic in the moments you are not happy.

Emotionally my mom is doing much better. Somethings, especially things as big as dealing with a super rare cancer that nobody really knows how to treat, going through surgery and chemo warrants some anxiety....it warrants a lot of anxiety, right? Luckily, time, starting treatment and some good results have helped and she is doing so much better. Such an example of how you can be positive amidst hard times. Someone who reminds me what life is really all about.

So, here is the thing you can laugh about that makes no rational sense. I could understand being worried about Tyler's upcoming surgery, Danny's chronic pain from surgery, the unborn babe being healthy, the pain my kidneys have been causing me lately. But no, I was worried about expenses. Now a therapist could very well say that was the manifestation of my anxiety and it was a combination of everything. Who knows, but all that really seemed to be stressing me was expenses.

One expense after another consumed me. Large bills like Danny's surgery, Tyler's hospital stays, Tylers upcoming surgery, Danny being out of work, condo flooding, an accident, baby delivery expenses. Dropping a brand new bottle of lasix that broke was a big stress, instead of a darn it moment. Almost too much for me to handle. Or Scott's bike being run over by probably some kids playing a trick. It seemed like one thing after another and I just couldn't deal with it.

Amidst it all, I rationally knew we could deal with it and that it could be far worse. Danny has a job. That is a HUGE Blessing. Danny said about the condo, "It's just money. No one has died as a result of this problem, we haven't done anything illegal or made any moral compromises." Looking back, I almost feel bad writing this because I recognize there are so many that would trade their financial hardships for ours in a minute. Rationally, I realized that instead of beingupset and frustrated and worried about these things, I should instead realizethat we are so very blessed.

But it wasn't that simple. My head was telling me one thing and my emotions were doing another. That is the strange thing about anxiety. It is almost as if it takes over.

The Lord placed people in my path to remind me of my many blessings. A friend reminded me that they are living week to week with the goal to afford to send her kids to EFY. Another whose husband is leaving her after they had their fourth girl. Another who is loosing their home. Anotherwho lost everything financially due to an accident. Another who lost everythingdue to a mistake at work. There arecountless people that I think of that would do anything for a job, let alone a job that they love like Danny. That would do anythingto be home with their kids. That woulddo anything to know where their next meal is coming from or how they are going to get the money to pay for something. And yet I am worried about unexpectedexpenses that we can afford.

The largest worry was our condo flood. We were getting thousands of dollars of estimates from the two units below us that seemed unreal for an overflowing toilet that was resolved in about an hour. Estimates including doing 24 hour STAT water testing costing $1000, not to mention other similar costs-- Who does that? Maybe people whose insurance will cover it. Things that I feel would have been dealt with way differently since it was the homeowners expense. I didn't have control over decisions being made or what was being done and I felt helpless. On top of that, a second flood happened as a result of either the plumber or restoration company changing the positioning of a vent. So we got a call the next day stating there was another flood. Of course, nobody has yet to own up to it and I wasn't there supervising, and I told the person who authorized it that I was not comfortable with that. He said he will "deal with it," but he didn't deal with it. I received no help. I was told to contact them. They were not supervised by him even though he said he would be over it.

I knew it was irrational, but I just couldn't stop worrying about it.

So I got up, unable to sleep after only acouple of hours of sleep and read an ensign article. It reminded us that we are commanded to be grateful, that our Heavenly Father wants us to begrateful. It had you list the following things you are grateful for which are below. It was so helpful.

It reminded me that one of the greatest therapies for me is writing. That is why I have this blog. If I was a private person it would be a journal. I don't think anyone reads these posts, but there is something about writing and putting it out to the world to see that helps me.

And I started realizing I needed to get back to the book that I am in the very slow process of writing. It is always in the back of my thoughts, a nudge that it is something I need to do, probably more for me than anyone else. My dad started a cancer related bible study and I recognized the need for aids to help people trying to walk with Christ through their own illness or the illness of another. How processing ideas and thoughts on paper can help.

So I started to do that. It felt so good. Words just come.

I placed my worries into the Lords hands. I recognized He could deal with it so much better than me. He could make things right. When I did that, little by little, things started falling into place. Resolutions occured. I knew that He was over all.

But perhaps the best part of all is that I got my sanity back. My anxiety disappeared that was a miracle in itself and I learned a couple of life lessons along the way.

Danny told me at some point that you just need to collect all the facts and than deal with the situation instead of trying to deal with half the facts or a couple pieces of the puzzle. I became better at that. I became better at just picking up the phone and trying to collect the facts instead of avoiding things.

I learned that there are people that are willing to help. To remain calm and happy. Nobody wants nor deserves to deal with a frustrated person. They are much more willing to help someone who is Christlike. I called several people for advice and know that they were answers to prayers.

And one afternoon, my anxiety went away. So farewell anxiety. While I want to thank you for the life lessons I have learned along the way, please don't come back. I thank you for helping me understand you a little bit more. Thank you for helping me recognize my many blessings. Thank you for helping me recognize that worrying really does no good. Thank you for allowing me to see how the Lord is really over all and can deal with our dilemas much better than we can.

Write 10 physicalabilities you are grateful for.

1. I am grateful I amalive. Carl and Tyler are constantreminders to me that my body was made whole. I have a whole brain to function. I have a whole heart to oxygenate my body. I know all too well what a blessing it is tohave functioning organs.

2. I am grateful that Ican breathe. Tyler has a really hardtime breathing. His heart makes him feelsick and exhausted. He tries to keep upwith his brother and friends and simply can’t. He teaches me to be grateful. Mygrandma dies of emphysemia and knew all too well how the simple act of taking abreathe sometimes doesn’t give you the oxygen you need.

3. I am grateful I canhave children. I know that there aremany who yearn and pray for a child. That can’t afford or haven’t been chosenby birthparents yet to have a child. Ihave children so easily. It is somethingthat I recognize is a blessing.

4. I am grateful that Ican walk and exist without chronic pain. Danny has back pain everyday. Janelleand Jenny live in arthritis pain everyday. My body functions without pain.

5. I am grateful I cansee. Kira just walked over to me with ahuge smile on her face and it made me feel so good. Some never get to experience that.

6. While it would be nicefor peace and quiet at times, I am grateful that I can hear. I get to hear my husbands and sons piano, Iget to hear funny conversations and things they say in the back of thecar. I get to communicate with anyonethat I want. That is something that manydon’t have.

7. I am grateful I canthink. We visited the Alzheimer unitthis week. It realized what a blessing itis to know who I am, remember my relationships, communicate with my family andfriends. Have the abilities to not onlytake care of myself, but my family as well.

8. I am grateful I amcancer free. My mom is currentlyfighting cancer and Bob is currently cancer free after extensive chemo. My body isn’t being attacked by this silentdisease. So many are not that fortunate.

9. I am grateful for myteeth. I don’t have teeth withoutproblems, but I have them. I can chewwhat I want. I live without tooth pain. What a blessing. What a blessing my husband can fix my teeth.

1 I am grateful I don’tget headaches. I got migraines in thebeginning of my pregnancy and couldn’t function. Some people get migraines everyday.

1 I am grateful fortrials…amidst this trial I know that it is molding me into the individual Ineed to become. At times I think lifewould be so much easier if we didn’t go through this or that but at the end oftrial, realize the growth that occurred and blessings that followed. I wouldn’t reach my Heavenly Father or bewith my family without these hard times. They help me recognize the good times. They help humble me. Rely on theLord. They help me treat others withmore compassion and empathy.

Write 10 materialpossessions you are grateful for.

1. My wedding ring. It belongs to my grandma who is one of myheros. It symbolizes a wonderful marriage to my best friend that Iam eternally grateful for. That is a blessing. A wedding ring doesn’t symbolize this for all. For some it is a symbol of pain, othersabuse, others heartache, others shame. Perhaps this is the greatest possession I have. And it would be the greatest even it was madeout of twigs or plastic.

2. My scriptures. They bring me peace. They help me see how I have progressed orneed to progress. They bring backfeelings from my conversion and mission. They help me communicate with God and draw closer to him.

3. The house we livein. I love it! It is in a wonderful community full ofkids. It is the perfect size for ourfamily. It keeps us warm at night. It is a place to build memories.

4. Swagger Wagon. Love it! Can truck as many kidsaround as I need. It used to be hard forme to help friends when in need because I had no room in my car. What a blessing to fit everyone I need andfor my kids to have time with their friends! I can visit people easily.

5. Bikes and RC cars = quality family time!

6. Appliances = simpler life.

7. Mobile Phone from the ice-age. I can communicate with family and friendswith a touch of the button.

8. Blog Book, Pictures and Journal. It helps me remember wonderful memories,lessons learned and gain perspective.

9. Our Christmas tree. It brings me peace and happiness. It has a couple of ornaments that were mostlyhand-made this year. It has lights. Scott chose it and it is beautiful!

1 My bed. It fits all ofour kids (I don’t know if that is a good or bad thing yet). I love everything about it.

Write 10 livingpeople you are grateful for.

1. Mom and Dad. They have always lived for their family andtaught us the important things in life. They love being grandparents and have always been the most generous andgiving people I know.

2. Glen andJanine. They raised a wonderfulson. They always focused on theimportant things in life and are great parents and grandparents.

3. Scott. He is such a good boy….just wants to be good. He takes care of his sister, has compassionfor his brother and is such a great friend. He often comes home telling me how he helped a friend.

4. Tyler. He is full of spunk and life. Unlike his brother, obedient, isn’t his middle name yet but that isok. He talks to Kira in the sweetestlittle voice. Anyone who meets him justloves him. We love him for the lifelessons he teaches us and mission he so patiently and valiantly fights with hisheart.

5. Carl. My Christmas angel. I feel him close by. Some of the moments I have with him are themost sacred, faith building times that I cherish and hold close to myheart. I am so grateful to have a child,who I envision as a young adult in the next life ministering to people here onearth and in the spirit world. I lovehim and look forward to meeting this angel that was too perfect to dwell onearth. What a humbling blessing to bechosen as his mom. How I want to doeverything I can to oneday return and be with him.

6. Kira. Our little girl. She is such a girl loving and nurturing herdolls and brothers. She has a smile thatmelts my heart. She has a special placein her dads heart. She brings sweetnessand beauty into our lives. She is soindependent and such a good little girl.

7. Baby McMillan. So blessed to be adding another bundle of joyinto our lives in March. I can’t wait tohold the heaven sent child that the Lord has entrusted me and Danny to carefor, love and teach (which I sometimes feel so inadequate of).

8. My SisterHeather. I have been blessed with onesibling and she is perhaps the nicest, kindest, most patient, loving personthat I know. She is the peacemaker. She is such a good mom. She is such a great friend. I have been given the best.

9. My friends. At times Danny and I go through a lot and Ihave never once felt I was going through it without hundreds of people by myside both near and far. Friends thatcall to see how we are doing, friends that drop off meals when someone is inthe hospital, friends that take my kids so I can have a needed break, friendswho would help at any request just because they care. I have been so blessed!

10. Of CourseDanny. I can’t imagine going throughthis life without Danny by my side. Hemakes the ups the best and the downs manageable. He is the best for me. I love him.

4. Write 10 deceasedpeople you are grateful for.

1 My Savior. I love Him.

Carl. I placed him under living as well notrealizing this section…but I am leaving it that way. While Carl is deceased, he is so close inspirit. Loosing a child makes the veilthin. Something that is hard todescribe. I have gotten to know him in aspiritual sense. I have felt him closeby, in times of need as the angel he is. What a gift!

3. My grandma. She lived with us growing up and was like asecond mom. She always was my biggestsupporter either at the pool or whatever I was doing (either a good idea orbad) she never gave up. She taught meresilient. She found peace and happinessand fulfillment although she didn’t always have it easy. I love her and knowshe is watching down on us.

4. Granny and Ga. I loved visiting them in Malibu and when theycame to visit. They were such examplesof love, patience and living the American dream. There family meant everything to them.

5. All of the angels thathave touched my life. Kennedy, Quincy,Grace, Hope and so many more…..These little kids fought various childhooddiseases with patience while teaching the rest of us what life is really about. I am grateful for them and look forward toone day saying thank you.

6. My ancestors. I love doing family history work. I should do more. It is a way to connect with your past andthose that sacrificed and gave so much for me. I am who I am today because of them.

7. The foundingfathers. What a wonderful country welive in.

Joseph Smith..he restored that gospel that brings me so much peace.

Write 10 things abouttoday you are grateful for.

Danny has the day offfor New Years which is rare . Tyler issetting up his car ramps. Scott lovesriding his bike. Building forts. Danny’s subwoofer project is going well. Driving in our van. Wally’s Rentals saving us tons of money. Wearing t-shirts in January. Our cozy home. My new comforter, sunglasses and trashcan…they make me happy. I am happy. I feel grateful. I feel blessed. It really is a good day!

Write 10 places onearth you are grateful for.

Our home. My homes growing up which is a home oflove. Espana where I learned somuch. BYU which is filled with great memories. Krey Elementary where Scott lovesschool. The temple. My parents home is filled with great childhood memories. Cancun where we honeymooned. Disneyland where I have great memories with my kids. Northgate High School filled with great memories.

Write 10 things aboutthe gospel you are grateful for. My testimony of the Savior. Prayer. Tender Mercies. The Holy Ghost. The scriptures. Temple Covenants. The atonement. Eternal Families. Trials. A Ward Family. Relief Society. Family History Work.

So this helped. The past couple of weeks have been a great wrestle. Lots of prayers, lots of pleading, lots of reading. lots of recognizing how much my faith means to me and can carry me through.

Danny and Heidi in 2011

2012-01-09T16:40:00.000-08:00

Work....

Danny left East Bay Dental after being there for years. It was a great job for him over the years. He has been there from the beginning and grown it to be a successful practice, but felt there wasn't much room for his own growth or where he saw himself forever so he decided to make a move. He found a job that he really enjoys. He works beside a pediatric practice and sees all the teens and adults. He really enjoys the girls he works with and is excited for this opportunity.

I on the other hand gave up coaching. It was a great part time job, but it was time for me to be home with the kids. It took a leap of faith, but I am so grateful that Danny urged me to stay home and decided to finally make the move to full time stay at home mom. There isn't a day that goes by that I would rather be doing anything else than be with my kids. I don't have to say no to something I want to do with them because of work. It is the BEST and I feel so very blessed!

Home....

We have loved living in Brentwood. It is a good fit for our family. We are living in the cutest house which we love. It is perfect and such a great community. Scott has made some good friends from school and we enjoy bike riding for playdates. Today when I picked up Scott, tons of kids were walking home from school and I thought, "this is why I love Brentwood." Not only are there a ton of kids, but they still play outside. Love it!

Church....

Danny is in primary. It seems to be his niche in life. I am in Cubscouts which is perfect for me because I can't have a huge commitment. I do the paperwork and organize activities, which is fine, but not what I love to do. Our new ward is really nice. I miss the days that life had no commitments and we could go and do as we please which basically meant hanging out with friends and their kids. I guess we all have to enter the school years at some point.

Health....

Physically I can't wait to not be pregnant. I have nothing to complain about compared to many, but am sick for the first 3 or 4 months, followed by tired and wanting my body back. Every pregnancy has been a little different. I feel like I have been so emotional this time around. Emotionally, I am not quite sure how to take care of 4 kids yet, and we have to get through Danny and Tylers surgery and recovery, so I am glad that the baby is still in my stomach. We feel it is a boy and are grateful that the baby has a full heart and full brain.

Danny has been a trooper through his recovery. It is a really tough surgery and continues to be in a lot of pain as his muscles get used to the new placement of his bones. His last recovery was a long process, so he deals with one day at a time, looking forward to the day when he is hopefully pain free.

I admire him for his positive attitude and patience. I would not be able to deal with this like he does.

Patience....

It has been the year of patience. We thought Tyler's surgery would be this year, but that didn't happen, which we are alright with and feel that things happen as they are meant to happen with him. I have learned to adjust. Danny's recovery is a recovery of patience. We learned patience in the timing to move. We are learning patience with Danny buying a practice. We are learning patience with our rental. We are learning patience with my mom and Bob's fight with cancer. Sometimes challenges and life doesn't go as planned and the journey transforms us along the way. There is so much to learn and grow. I am grateful for these opportunities to grow...too bad it usually isn't an easy process. So that is 2011 for you in a nutshell. Onto another year which I am sure will continue to be filled with all new excitement, adventure and life lessons...

Kira in 2011

2012-01-09T15:43:00.000-08:00

Kira = Independent. This girl wants to do everything by herself. When she started being spoon fed she would not let anyone feed her wanting to feed herelf. That continues to be her personality. Whether undressing herself, climbing into the bath and turning on the water she is Ms. Independent. It actually makes my life really easy in some ways.

She is such a social little girl and will go up to anyone to start a conversation.

She is pretty tough and can hang with whatever the boys are doing and zooms around cars and pretends to build legos. In other ways, she loves her babies and dolls and has imaginary conversations with them or on the phone. She loves shoes. Putting on everyones shoes. She can actually sit and play with things for long periods of time, is verbally understood and speaks spanish words back unlike her brothers who were still mute at her age. Girls mature so much faster than boys in some ways.

She is determined to be a big girl. Getting out of a crib way earlier than either of us wanted, not sitting in a high chair and trying to potty train herself. This girl is Spiderman and can climb in, out and on top of anything. She has a mischevious side to her and will be naughty just to be naughty.

Before Danny's surgery, she would have Danny do anything and everything for her. Time has helped her get back to realizing that dad is just as good as mom (which I LOVE)..we are getting there.

She is emotional. Jokingly, Danny and I told her to go to her bed instead of ours and she just started to cry and be so sad. When her brothers are mean to her, she gets so sad more than anything...that will make the teenage years fun, right?

We love Kira so much. Her smile lights up her entire face and just makes us smile.

Tyler in 2011

2012-01-09T14:26:00.001-08:00

It has been a pretty good year for Tyler (relatively speaking). A very active 4 year old awaiting for a Fontan is a delicate situation. As much as Danny and I let Tyler live a normal life, he just doesn't feel good most of the time and it shows. His sats have continually dropped throughout the year (probably around 70's most of the time) and it has made it hard for our very active and lively 4 year old to live how his mind wants but heart doesn't allow. Knowing how to parent Tyler is difficult. It is hard to know if his behavior is a result of him running around and feeling crummy or just acting crummy. I am sure it is a combination of the two.

Tyler finished up joy school in Walnut Creek. He was with 3 very cute and very sweet girls and did fairly well. I am sure he was the most trouble of the group but enjoyed going and enjoyed being with friends. He loves singing time every week. It is the perfect activity for him because he gets to sit or I carry him when we march. Other activities aren't quite the same. Activities that involve walking around end in an agitated, crying and whining child or just giving up and sitting and panting. He is finally potty trained which took three tries until he was actually ready and succeeded. He gave up the binky after his Fontan kept getting postponed, which wasn't as bad as I thought. He learned to ride a bike this year, but can only go for short periods of times and prefers the tag-a-long or trailer.

We have really tried to slow down with what we do, but it is still hard. He can either be the sweetest little guy to his brother and sister or a handful that tests all of our patience.

He has only been hospitalized twice this year which were the results of trying to get his Fontan, not heart issues, which we know is a great blessing. In August, his heart was too weak and in October, the surgeon wasn't confident in some of his team members. So we have waiting patiently and look forward to another date at the end of January. We hope that this will make him feel better and give him some of the energy that he needs.

As difficult as he can be, he is loved by so many. He has a unique spirit that people just love. He has so many people praying for him which we are so grateful for. He continues to teach us so many eternal lessons that we are so grateful for! He is a little man of many faces.

We are hoping that heart surgery will be a great way to start 2012.

Jan 2012

2012-01-07T20:18:00.000-08:00

Kira likes to park the cars, just like the boys.

Scott built a lot of this Pirates of the Caribbean lego set.

Shortly thereafter, Kira pulled it off the dresser and broke it. Scott was surprisingly mature.

Heidi and I are mostly de-stressed about the condo. After the flood, I replaced the toilet and dishwasher, and Heidi helped me put a new floor in the bathroom. It has been a big stress, but I tell people, "At least this problem doesn't involve any illegal activity or moral wrongdoing. No one has died as a result of this negligence."

Today, as we were putting in the tile and I was placing the grout, I said, "Construction is not hard. Physically demanding, but mentally relaxing."

Scott of 2011

2012-01-04T12:22:00.000-08:00

This was a year of firsts and growth for Scott. He continues to be mini-Danny in so many ways fixing his RC toys, the car or playing with his soldering iron alongside dad. He has surpassed my ability in lego building and loves everything hands on.

He has transformed into a confident and social 5 year old. He finished up Walnut Acres Pre-K continuing to extend his hours. He had friends in school and became less timid, but still had a hard time initiating friendships and being confident in who he was. He cared about what others thought of him or who he played with day which we worked on. He always tried his best.

Scott's personality transformation occured in the summer during rec swimming. He learned to be independent, social and confident. While I worked, he had to make friends and create fun. Before long, he would find friends, have fun and became this confident, independent, social 5 year old.

We moved to Brentwood before Scott started school. He played soccer and had a great time! For the first half he waiting for the ball to come to him and one day decided to go for the ball. He became such a good little player and had as much fun in the game as on the side eating oranges and playing with teammates. He made some great friends on the team and always felt good about himself.

Kindergarten has been a great experience for Scott. He loves to go and see his friends. He runs out of the van and is greeted by friends. This is the best part as a parent! He doesn't mind learning, but is definetely not at the point that he wants to spend his spare time learning.I figure that this is the joy of kindergarten. All Danny and I wanted for him this year was to enjoy going to school, be kind to others and have friends which he has.

He started the piano this year and has been doing great. The joy of practicing depends on the day. Danny wanted to teach him suzuki, but it seems he likes reading better. He did great at his first concert. He even did a singing solo and duet this year in church. He wasn't too happy after his duet but made it through. He is the loudest primary singer and def. not the most on key (probably thanks to me) but usually feels good about himself afterwards. What a change from not even singing last year as a sunbeam.

He is such a good big brother. He and Tyler are either best of buddies or worst of enemies. He takes such good care of Kira. He takes her to the potty when she asks, speaks in the cutest voice and sometimes even entertains her when I ask

He is thoughtful of others. We will do a small and simple kind act for something and it impacts him so much. He ensures we always read the scriptures, say our prayers and have FHE. He is quick to pray for help and is starting to form such a wonderful relationship with our Savior.

Overall, it has been a great year for Scott!

2011-12-27T22:17:00.000-08:00

Christmas 2011 was great.

Tyler got these Kre-o blocks (lego wannabe's) and Heidi ended up assembling most of the piece.

Kira accessorizing her dollies

Sometimes Scott is so endearing as an older brother. Here, he is showing Kira how to assemble her dollies.

The kiddos working on their Christmas projects. You can't tell, but E-maxx is on the table and I was replacing the chassis, skid plate, steering turnbuckles and posts.

Scott got a huge lot of hot wheels track from craigslist and I showed him what my cousins and I used to do. We used to hang out at Grandpa McMillan's on conference Saturday and run the cars down the stairs. The best was the bus, because it could launch all the way to the fireplace.

I'm proud of Scott's piano progress.

Kira has been talking a lot lately. And we can understand her. Today, she asked for "leche." Yessss!

Tyler got a razor from Craigslist and he's stoked! Also, he's off the binky and his open bite is already beginning to close.

Heidi and I got this dope brass piano lamp from craigslist. It's super heavy--probably from the 1960's, back when "Made in America" meant something.

I am happy to be able to walk on my own two feet without my cane. Today I didn't have much back pain and I was able to enjoy my day at work. My legs are getting stronger and I can maintain higher speeds on my bicycle. The kids were extra fussy today, though. Heidi had a doctor's appointment and I guess it was pretty stressful because of the kids' attitudes. So for FHE, we had a lesson on respect. I spoke to the kids in English (I thought of Ben Wiederhold and his lessons) and said, "I am not too stoked about your whining. We ask you to do things and you whine or cry. We are trying to raise you to be responsible people. When you're older and you have a job, if your boss asks you to do something and you whine, you'll get fired. I'm also not happy about how you have been treating Mommy. You need to be respectful of adults. I don't give you everything you want because everything you want is not always good for you. I don't let you drink soda all day because you'll rot your teeth.

Tyler said, "I want soda."

"No."

He persists: "Sodaaaaaaaaa."

"Tyler, I said no, and if you ask again, you're going right to bed."

Then Tyler says, a little more quietly, "soda."

So I took him to bed. Looks like he didn't learn anything from my spiel.

Back in the day, I thought I gave a pretty effective speech to the freshmen academy chem 105 class in college. They had done poorly on their test because they had stayed up until 3:00 most nights and were sleeping through my class. I said, "How many of you are less than happy about your grades?"

Most of the hands went up.

"Why do you think this is? Am I not teaching you the right material?"

One of the brighter students, but who also had a talking problem, said, "It's because we're not listening to you."

"Yes, that's right. Some of you think you're smarter than I am. Some of you probably are. That doesn't give you any reason to talk when I'm talking. It is disrespectful and prevents others from learning."

Then, during my speech, students were talking! Good grief! I started talking really loudly to drown them out. One of the students said, "Why are you yelling?"

Freshmen.

So here I am, trying to give my kids lessons on how to succeed, and they're not listening. I was a great parent until I had kids, and I was mostly prepared for kids pushing my buttons, but I was a little disheartened that my speech had no immediate effects.

Eh, whatever. Night night.

Some 50 mm lens pictures

2011-12-20T21:16:00.000-08:00

Kira looking cute in her Christmas dress

Mr. T showing us his open bite. Heidi decided it was time to give up the binky.

Scott at his first piano recital at Eskaton lodge. He played Jolly Old St. Nicholas and We Three Kings. I was pleased.

His piano teacher, Trish

Heidi making friends with the residents

Classic Tyler. You better watch out, man, a bird's gonna land on that lower lip!

A vid of half of Scott's performance

I'm free!

2011-12-13T13:14:00.000-08:00

I got my post-op x-ray yesterday, after 10.5 weeks of recovery. I have been using a cane and I felt good about my progress, so I was pretty confident the x-ray would look good. Since I read x-rays, I asked to see my own. The tech refused, and I was like, "I gotta see it." Finally, she relented and I had a look. I said, "See? No evidence of heterotopic ossification. It looks good."

So I emailed my doctor, and I almost told him what my findings were. But I just said that I was pleased. He concurred. So I am free to do full weight-bearing! Yesssssss! Eh, I pretty much already knew that. I'm still a little wobbly, so I might use the cane here and there. When I ride my bike, though, the leg feels good. Solid.

Six minutes

2011-12-09T07:39:00.001-08:00

Upon cleaning the van with Heidi, Scott and Kira:

Tyler: Daddy, can I come inside? Because the garage is really freaking me out.
Me: Oh?
Tyler: Yeah. It's freaking me out. So can I come inside a little bit, for six minutes?
Me: Yes, sir.

Suzuki

2011-12-05T08:22:00.001-08:00

Scott has been taking piano lessons for a few months and is doing quite well. My mom brought me the old Suzuki books from which I studied as a youth, and today, Scott had his first Suzuki lesson with me. We did "Pepperoni Pizza," as I remember Rick teaching me 28 years ago. Scott did well and I was pleased. When we were done, he said with a scowl, "Now can I play with your iPhone?"

This week

2011-11-20T11:19:00.001-08:00

Tyler was in the hospital from Sunday to Tuesday night. The surgery was supposed to be on Friday, but they moved it to Wednesday. He was on milrinone to give his heart a little rest prior to surgery. The good news was his echo looked much better this stay than in August when they cancelled his surgery due to his heart function. So Tony was really pleased with how his increase in meds helped his heart over the past couple of months.

Tyler did pretty good. His IV's kept failing which was a pain. I was not on my A game during his first IV attempt when I let two different people poke him before asking for the best. The resident told me she was confident in herself and would try one more time. I politely said that I believed her but wanted to know who the best was. Luckily the charge nurse came in who I LOVE, heard our conversation and immediately got an attending cardiologist and anesthesiologist. They reminded me this was a training hospital and I needed to be firm. My only job in the hospital is to keep Tyler happy so I did a better job throughout our stay with that.

The best part of the stay was ice-cream and chicken nuggets for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The first two days we couldn't go to the playroom because he was on ICU status. It got much better when he went from the intensivist/cardiologist care to just cardiologist care.

I met with the surgeon around 5pm, one last pre-op set of labs were taken at 6:30 and suddenly around 30 minutes later a surgeon came came to tell us something came up with Tony, the lead surgeon and his surgery was cancelled. They felt really bad and we were home by 9pm.

So for now we just wait to hear from UCSF. We were hoping to be out of the hospital by Christmas so we could go to Utah but now we will have to stay. We know that the Lord is over this whole plan and have faith that everything will happen in his timing. Until then, we will really enjoy the time we have with Tyler and our family.

Grammy came out from Utah for the second time to help with the kids during surgery. While it was an inconvenience for everyone, we made the most of it and all had fun playing with Grammy for the rest of the week. So instead of surgery we went bowling.

A quick stay

2011-11-16T14:52:00.001-08:00

Not again

2011-11-15T19:45:00.001-08:00

I was all ready for Tyler's surgery tomorrow. Then Heidi called to say that something came up in the surgeon's life and he couldn't do the surgery. So the surgery is canceled. Weh. Bah. Phooey. Daaaaaaaa! Heidi and Tyler are on their way home. I am quite disappointed because last time we were all ready, they postponed it. There have to be good explanations and reasons for all of this but hearing this news agitated me.

I feel like standing up on a soapbox and ranting, but I'm in healthcare too and I don't have all the answers anyway. I just feel like we're getting a big run-around that's becoming inconvenient. But I am glad to see Heidi and Tyler again. Since I can't ride my motorcycle to UCSF, getting out there is a timely deal. I actually considered getting a collapsible cane, putting it in my backpack and riding the VFR to UCSF.

What would my orthopedic surgeon say? He'd say no. Then I'd ask, "What would you do if your kid were in the hospital?" I'm pretty sure he'd say, "I'd do what I wanted." Right. Still, my muscles are weak. I have had a lot on my mind and I feel like Heidi, the kids and I have done a good job of managing, but now I am unraveling. Okay. That's all for now. Daaaaaaaaa, I could yell!

Surgery is tomorrow

2011-11-15T16:27:00.001-08:00

Yes, they have moved Tyler's Fontan from Friday to Wednesday. I'm glad about this because that means two more days for him to recover before Christmas. Heck, he may be feeling good for Thanksgiving! Eh, we'll see.

Milrinone underway

2011-11-14T13:39:00.001-08:00

Tyler, Heidi and I went to UCSF Sunday afternoon. We got a suite in 7 East, like old times, and a lot of things had changed. First, they don't let you ride the regular elevators to the 6th or 7th floors. They don't let you use the stairs, either. Second, there were many different pieces of equipment and color schemes. I was fascinated by the vein finder, which I discovered, upon scrutiny, was a broad band laser. It adequately showed the veins in Tyler's hand, but the people still struggled to get a valid IV and had to do five attempts.

Poor Tyler was screaming, "I don't want a shot! Take it out! I WANNA GO HOME!" Eventually he calmed down and the milrinone began pumping. He watched some DVD's and then it was time for bed.

Tyler's Heart

2011-11-12T17:03:00.001-08:00

Tyler goes to UCSF tomorrow for a second attempt at the Fontan. He will be placed on Milrinone and have the Fontan on Friday. Pray for our little man.

33

2011-11-12T12:38:00.001-08:00

Happy Birthday to my wonderful husband and best friend Danny. Danny worked the entire day at UOP on the day of his birthday. Before you feel bad, he was so excited to finally be able to work a whole day after surgery. Perhaps the best present is to be back to work. His colleagues brought him out to lunch and he said he had a GREAT day.

The following day, we opened presents and had some friends over to surprise Danny. He was surprised and we had a great time with new friends from Brentwood and old friends from Walnut Creek. One of my best friends recently moved to Sacramento and she was able to come with her adorable family which was so much fun!

33 has been a great year for Danny full of good changes. Top 5 blessings of the year:

1. Work. Danny continues to love being a dentist and teaching at the school. When you are first married you just want any job. As you mature as a couple you want nothing more for your spouse to find a love and fulfillment in what they do each day. None of the money in the world can buy that and I feel so blessed that Danny has saught a profession that he loves. One of the greatest blessings in our lives. He is working at an office that he loves and that loves him. Yeah for Danny!

2. Brentwood. We moved to a community that we love. We miss being close to our Walnut Creek friends. We had some great friends. But this is right for our family. Scott loves his school. There are tons of kids and Danny has a 5 minute bike ride to work.

3. A new Hip. So blessed that Danny will not have to live in pain the rest of his life. Blessed for the doctors that worked so hard to help Danny. Blessed that we could afford for him to stop work and pay for the medical bills for him to have surgery. Hopefully next year he will be able to walk to work if he wants (which he won't but at least it can be an option).

4. Family. Our kids make us laugh every day. It is so neat to see them achieve new things. Every morning, the kids go into the driveway waving bye to Danny and blowing kisses. Nothing compares. We also have a great family in Walnut Creek and UT. Not to mention ward family.

5. Life actually gets better with every passing year. Our bodies might not agree, but our love for each other, life and the Lord increases and adds excitement for the adventures of the upcoming year.

Happy Birthday Danny! I love you! You truly are the best husband and dad. I couldn't be any luckier!

A nephew and a niece

2011-11-12T12:16:00.001-08:00

We had a nephew and niece born September 20th who are both so cute! Danny's sister, Michelle, had an adorable little boy, Brockton, who is a true Olson...just as cute as big sis and bro. David, Danny's brother and his wife Juliann, adopted a precious little girl, Clarissa. David and Juliann have been waiting for years to welcome a little baby into their lives and we are thrilled for their dream to become a reality. Clarissa is a true testament of the power of miracles and miracle of adoption. I was excited when Juliann told me she was going to post about her precious girl on her blog so I could share this wonderful news. Thank you to all who have prayed for David and Juliann during this journey. Brockton and Clarissa are precious and we can't wait to make it to Utah as soon as our lives calm down to snuggle (Heidi) or throw in the air (Danny) these little ones.

Mi Pueblo

2011-11-07T16:49:00.000-08:00

Heidi, Kira, and I went to Mi Pueblo in Pittsburg for dinner since Grandma had the boys. I drove the swagger wagon for the first time since my surgery and it was great being behind the wheel again. Good old swagger wagon.

At Mi Pueblo, we ordered some tacos al pastor and some tacos con carne asada, as well as a burrito with carne al pastor. It was the best burrito we had ever had. Mmmm, Mi Pueblo. The next day, I tried to make some carne al pastor and it wasn't the same. My beans were still good, though. I'm also into making my own tortillas and Scott helped roll them out. It took about twice as long, but I'm glad he's into doing things himself.

The spanish experiment

2011-11-05T16:01:00.000-07:00

Me: Kira, me das ese toalla? (Will you give me that towel?)
She gives me the towel.
Me: Gracias. Sabes que significa eso? (Thank you. Do you know what that means?)
Kira: Thank you.

The spanish experiment is working!

Silver Tongue

2011-11-02T09:15:00.000-07:00

Tyler: Mommy, my tummy hurts.
Mommy: Oh, then no candy today.
Tyler: My tummy doesn't hurt anymore.
[laughter]
Tyler: Stop it! I'm not your friend anymore!

A change

2011-10-26T09:45:00.000-07:00

Tyler has had a change of attitude. Previously, he would wake up with a scowl and growl, "Where's my iPhone?" And he would complain, whine, and scream all day, despite having the iphone. About three days ago, he suddenly turned into a sweet, charming young man. We are unsure of the reasons behind the change but are really enjoying them. This morning, he bathed with Kira. He said, "Kira went poopy in my bed."

"Oh really?"

"Yes, a big dump." That's my boy.

A cupcake Tyler decorated at Erin's birthday party

Kira at Scott's soccer game

Scott scored a goal and this was the first soccer game I went to.

How am I doing? All things considered--specifically, my left PAO--I am well. Still, I have a lot of pain down to my kneecap in the form of paresthesia. Why don't I take pain meds? Because they were making me psycho: aggression, anxiety, and nightmares. So I don't take anything. Also, the circulation is poor so when I stand up, all the blood goes down to my foot and stays there. The extra pressure is uncomfortable. And my right leg is always cold as a result of the poor circulation.

I also have to fight depression because I'm used to being able to do anything. You know, you just wake up, stand up on your own two feet, and start being productive. I can't do anything without my crutches, and I've learned how to hold things in both hands and negotiate the crutches, but it's still hard. My left leg is weaker after the PAO and balancing on it isn't that easy.

I'm still grateful to have the challenges we have. Some people hate their jobs. Some don't have jobs but want them. Some hate their spouses. All other aspects of my life are good. It seems we have had to pay a lot of dues to the medical community, and that's fine.

We are grateful to those who have helped us: meals, childcare, lawn services, and visits. Thank you!

Cute Pic With Pop

2011-10-20T15:19:00.001-07:00

I have been asked what these are. They are called Skippy Pets brought to you by a nice man named Skip. My sister got 6 of them for Paisley's birthday and they were sooo much fun. They are motorized animals that sing while you ride. They go forward, back, around and around. I need a couple of these for my backyard!

Needing a Village

2011-10-17T21:51:00.000-07:00

Danny is doing awesome! He might not totally agree with that statement as he can't walk, but all in all, is doing great!

Today we dropped off Scott and headed to the store, library and post office. He survived it! Amazing! He is totally off his pain meds. It will not surprise his surgeon since he thinks Danny is a little crazy and has a high pain threshold after his last surgery. I will never forget when Danny was cleared to do whatever with his hip, he decided to ride his bicycle to his first therapy appt. I think the therapist only had him come in 1 more time.

As for the rest of us. We need to take lessons from Danny. I thought Kira was teething all last week. She had a little fever and diarrhea but worst of all would wake up and be in pain. Not just a little, but a lot. Like not allow you to hold her, throw her tiny body on the floor and roll around screaming. It was hard. I realized how lucky we have been with her. When she is not herself for a week I went crazy. I become an emotional, tired, impatient person. I didn't know if she was sick or becoming a difficult child overnight.

Thankfully, she started feeling better. Tyler came down with a high fever and diarrhea which actually made me relieved that Kira was indeed sick. Stopped his lasix and took it easy. Tyler did nothing for two days. I got a much milder case. Ears and throat hurt and had a constant stomach ache. Luckily Scott and Danny got very few symptoms.

So this is the best part of the story. When I was tired and needed a break, that is exactly what I got!! All weekend friends helped. Brought our kids to park and brought us dinner. I used to have a really hard time accepting help and now I try to embrace it. I realize I can't do this alone nor should I. Having a sick child forces you to learn this lesson. The best part of having others help you is that your love for these friends grows and desire to do service in the future increases.

It truly takes a village to raise a family and I feel blessed for the wonderful village that the Lord has and continues to bless our family with!

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em

2011-10-17T17:49:00.000-07:00

I was a great parent until I had kids. I fought and fought to keep the kids well-rounded instead of glued to their media devices. For a while, it was the Nintendo DS. Well, we solved that by giving them back to grandma. Now the boys are addicted to the iphones. I can't really entertain them with my physical limitations, so I just give the iphones to the boys to keep them occupied so I can have some peace and quiet. Except that it's not quiet. They turn up the volume all the way on these obnoxious games.

Then I gave Tyler some headphones. It was nice for about two minutes, but Tyler didn't hold out. I said, "Either you wear your headphones or you go to another room." That worked and I was able to take a nap.

I'll give you candy

2011-10-15T19:24:00.000-07:00

Tyler: Daddy, can you download me a new game on your iphone?
Me: No, you have enough.
Tyler: I'll give you candy!
Me: Really?
Tyler: Yes, I'll give you chocolate chips!
Me: Okay, go get them.

Then he got distracted and then it was time for the bath. No chocolate chips for me.

Clayton Valley Pumpkin Patch

2011-10-14T18:47:00.000-07:00

When Danny and I were in the hospital, my parents took the boys to the pumpkin patch. From the looks of it they had a lot of fun!

Grandma Needs Prayers

2011-10-11T21:28:00.001-07:00

My mom got diagnosed with chronic lymphocytic leukemia (CLL) 4 years ago. The week Tyler was born. She has done really well and been more or less asystematic with occasional shingles and such from a weak immune system. She was able to live a relatively normal life.

About two months ago she had horrible back pain and was diagnosed with a herniated disc which has improved with time. And two weeks ago she started having double vision. After seeing specialists, they decided to do a spinal tap to see if her leukemia was present in the cerebrospinal fluid. It was present which is pretty rare and doesn't have a great prognosis without treatment. So tomorrow my mom will be going into surgery to get a permanent catheter placed in a canal in her brain to start chemo on Monday.

This internet describes it better:

People who have leukemia in their cerebrospinal fluid, or who are at high risk of having leukemic cells migrate to the spinal fluid, receive chemotherapy directly into the cerebrospinal canal. This is known as intrathecal chemotherapy.

Intrathecal chemotherapy is necessary because drugs given via IV do not sufficiently penetrate into the cerebrospinal fluid or brain and, thus, cannot kill leukemia cells there. Insufficient penetration of drugs into the cerebrospinal fluid results in uncontrolled growth of leukemic cells in the cerebrospinal fluid. Sometimes the therapy is inserted into a sac placed in one of the larger fluid-filled areas of the brain, a ventricle. The sac is known as an Ommaya reservoir, so named after its developer.

So keep her in your prayers. She is having a pretty hard time with all of this, as most of us would. There are not many cases detected where CLL is found in the CSF. With that said, the majority of CLL patients that have an autopsy do indeed have CLL present in their spinal fluid. So maybe it was a blessing in disguise that her eye was attacked and they detected the cancer in her CNS. I believe this cancer responds well to chemo and most patients go into remission. Doctors also told her that this type of chemo doesn't have the horrible side effects of other chemo drugs. She will be receiving chemo twice a week and we are hoping she is able to live a pretty normal life during the treatment.

We will keep you updated and in the meantime pray that she will respond to treatment and stay optimistic through it all.

Paisley Turns 1

2011-10-11T19:26:00.000-07:00

My sister's beautiful daughter, Paisley, turned 1 this weekend and we had a great time celebrating. My sister threw a very special birthday party at my parents. She is beautiful and we love her so much!! Happy Birthday Paisley! Grandma and Pop of course threw the best party followed by a second party that night for the Porshe club.

Post Op Week 1

2011-10-10T10:58:00.000-07:00

This week has been filled with family time. We are trying to take advantage of the time that we have together with Scott on school break and Danny home all day. While Danny isn't 100% we are still trying to make the most of our time together. Tyler's upcoming surgery makes our time together even more meaningful and special! We were blessed to have Danny's dad come into town for a couple of days to help. He brought the boys fishing two days. Brother Jeffs brought them out on his boat one day which was a lot of fun. He cleaned the rugs (wahooo!) and had some quality time with the kiddos. We are so grateful for his help.

The update on Danny. He is doing well. Much better than last surgery. He is proud that he can pretty much do all necessary tasks by himself. He is tolerating his pain. He rotates oxicodone and Tylenol. He probably takes about 2 pills during the day and 2 at night. I think he should take more since he had his hip taken apart and screwed back together, but he thinks he is more careless when he is on meds. Grateful he is doing well. Scott is our biggest helper. Tyler doesn't like to help but is being a pretty good boy (for Tyler). Kira is a lot of work because she wants her dad. She loves her daddy. Always had and he just can't take care of her because she doesn't understand his limits. She has been getting pretty upset. I think part of it is due to teething as well. I don't know how single moms do it. This is hard work taking care of three kiddos and I still have some help from Danny. Gaining empathy for those who have a much harder task than I do.

Here are our cuties. #1 Kira. #2 Scott made a jump with the longboard. #3 Scott giving Danny his daily shot. #4 Tyler. #5 I was so proud of myself for fixing a clogged sink. The things you can do when your husband is unable to do them. I didn't realize how simple it was to declog some pipes. I found some utterly disgusting smelling water, two popsicle sticks and a beer bottle lid that must have been there for quite a while. It was quite rewarding getting all the junk out of the pipes and even more rewarding when I had a kitchen sink back. Go Me! #6

Danny is the Man

2011-10-05T07:57:00.001-07:00

Danny pre-op

Danny recovering

So Danny has his PAO on Friday. He was supposed to go in for surgery at 11 and be done in 3 hours or so. He ended up going in at 12:50 and it lasted about 5 hours. He was in recovery around 6 and things went well...YIPEE!

The only complication he had was waking up with some irregular sinus rhythm's, EKG and heart arrhythmia's. I wasn't concerned because this happened last time as well. They sent us to the telemetry wing instead of post-op which simply means Danny has to wear an annoying heart monitor and be watched more closely. The arrhythmia's continued but nobody seemed concerned.

In 2009, Danny's left hip was case #11 and in 2011 his right hip was case #50 or so. In the past 2 years the surgery has really advanced (not to mention the surgery team has gotten more practice). Instead of going into the actual hip socket where the head of the femur lies, they simply sawed the acetabulum into a 3 piece triangle and placed it more appropriately over the femur. They don't have to release as many large leg muscles and it is usually an easier recovery. So far this has been true for Danny and we are soo grateful! If they need to correct things more internally, they go in arthroscopically in about 3 months which is a very simple procedure.

Danny was only in the hospital until Monday. 3 days post op instead of 5. He is in way less pain, even though he doesn't remember it being less painful than it is now. His heavy duty pain meds (percocet and oxicodone) were doing quite an interesting number on him. He was getting panic attacks, strange dreams and didn't want me to sleep in case he died or lost all nerves, so he decided to switch to Tylenol with occasional oxicodone when needed. His mental state has normalized and he is tolerating the pain like Danny does so well.

So he is in quite a bit of pain, but trying to manage it the best he can. He can get up for short periods of time. Nights are the worst. Last night I was so grateful and felt SOOO good when I slept continuously from 2-5 straight. Nights for Danny are a countdown until it is light and laying in the same position, being unable to sleep for very long and being in the worst pain of the day is over. When I think it is bad helping him change positions, get pain meds, go to the bathroom, situate pillows, etc, I try to think of how much worse it is for him. Hoping it gets better for the sake of all of us.

Let me tell you, he is one tough guy! He is continually grateful that he will hopefully not have to live in the constant pain he had pre-operatively. He is grateful they caught this in time to save his real hip. He is my optimist, which I am so grateful for. He is such an example to Tyler, me and the other kids of staying positive when life isn't exactly going 100%. Tyler watches him give himself shots and talks to him about when Tyler gets shots. I am glad he has someone he can relate to.

On Anonymous Comments

2011-09-28T10:09:00.001-07:00

Spurred by three anonymous comments.

I got one anonymous comment on my blog that simply had a different opinion. I realized that we have different morals in our household than most and many probably think I am different, which I am. I am actually proud of that. They weren't mean, just had a different opinion so don't really understand why they felt they needed to use anonymous but whatev..

But this is the one is the one that I just couldn't understand and the reason behind my post. It was downright mean. I can't help but wonder why people feel the need to say mean things. It was being mean about someone's teeth and why the mom didn't do anything about it. Something she has 0 control over and I am sure would love to change. My friend took the higher road and explained her situation better of having to wait for permanent teeth to come in.

I had the worse acne and teeth as a kid and I am not exaggerating. If I had photos, I would show you. You can't put braces on baby teeth or magically cure acne, so sometimes you just need to go through things as a kid that are tough. And guess what....it isn't always devastating. Sometimes the hard things we go through are actually blessings. I learned to gain confidence in who I was, not what I looked like. I learned to ignore the mean things kids say. But here is the thing...they were innocent kids who said these things...not adults.

I don't understand. I am not saying that I am perfect and haven't said things that offended others. If I have I hope that my friends understand it was not on purpose like some peoples comments. And I guess I shouldn't judge because maybe people don't realize that this could be hurtful.

Most of my friends who get mean comments are the beautiful, talented, hysterical people who everyone loves. My theory on their blogs is portrayed in mean girls. People are simple jealous and want them to feel bad.

When you are attacking someone personally don't spit the words out and go and hide behind anon. If it was just a different opinion I am sure the reader would understand. If you can't say it in a loving but different opinion kind of way maybe you shouldn't say it all. And if you feel you need to say anonymous, question why you feel you need to use that. There are certain situations where I am sure it is needed, but many situations aren't and maybe it is just that you are being mean.

I know this is the wrong audience because I have never had a mean comment. I have had different opinions a lot. I actally had some mean comments a while ago that I expected because of a heated political debate. It was kind of intolerant but I understood where they were coming from and grateful we could both have different opinion.

But lets get real folks, most people have some sort of tracker and can often figure out who you are if they really want to.

So that is my rant for the day.

Just be nice!

The Tigers

2011-09-27T22:47:00.000-07:00

Danny took pictures for Scott's U-6 soccer team. The photographer cancelled about a week ago so we just decided to go the free route. The lighting wasn't perfect, but I think that they turned out great. Aren't they a cute group of kids!

Peri-acetabular osteotomy...PAO

2011-09-27T14:18:00.000-07:00

Danny will have his right hip PAO on Friday. He started having hip pain as a teenager. His family doctor overlooked hip dysplasia and he was dismissed with, "don't be so hard on your body". He always felt his hips weren't alligned.

Educational moment....If you or someone you know is in hip pain GET IT LOOKED AT!! Go to specialists. Don't take "just deal with it" for an answer or wait until it gets worse. An x-ray was able to easily detect his dysplasia. Congenital Hip Dysplasia is usually treatable in infants and children. The older you get the worse it becomes. Your cartilage wears which can result in arthritis. Replacements aren't the best answer for a relatively young person since they don't last very long. Be an advocate for your health or a loved one if you suspect hip dysplasia.

We had a miracle two years ago when Danny started to have severe pelvis and testicular pain. He went to specialists to figure out what was going and came back with the answer... hip dysplasia. He was told that if left untreated, his left hip would most likely become arthritic in a couple of years and unable to save.

His left hip was done two years ago. It was originally more painful and severe and now feels better than his right hip. This gives him hope for the upcoming surgery and recovery. His previous recovery was within normal limits. The surgeons cut a nerve and tried to repair it which caused a very painful neuroma. Danny couldn't take it one day, called the surgeon and they operated that week to sever the nerve. It made all the difference. He is planning all telling the surgeon to leave any damaged nerves instead of trying to stitch them up. The loss of sensation sometimes bothers him but nothing he can't live with.

He was in the hospital for five days. His surgery took about six hours. He was severly anemic following the surgery which caused an irregular SP wave in his EKG (a normal response). The neroma caused the most pain. He wasn't able to bear weight for 6 weeks, light weight bearing for another 6 weeks and was able to walk without crutches within 3 months. I think he was in bed for about a month with little jonts around the house.

He is excited to get the surgery behind him and be out of the daily pain that he lives in. He is in pain after walking 20 feet. He never complains but doesn't want to do anything that involves walking. We have friends who live in daily arthritis pain. At times crawling around the house because it is too painful to walk. We recognize that Danny is very blessed that their is a cure for hip dysplasia. There are so many diseases that don't have a cure yet . We are a family that truly understands the significance of all the doctors and researchers that spend their lives dedicated to finding cures to improve the lives of others. Thank You!

We have been blessed to be able to financially save for his surgery and time off work. We are blessed and grateful for family that is able to help during recovery. My parents will watch the kids while we are in the hospital, Danny's dad is coming out for a couple of days when he gets home from the hospital and we have countless friends who are ready to do whatever we need to make life easier.

We will keep you updated.

Here is some educational information on hip dysplacia and PAO....

Hip dysplasia

Hip dysplasia is a developmental condition that is often recognized and treated in infancy. It is caused by an abnormal development of the hip joint. Normally, the hip socket or acetabulum develops its shape in response the head of the femur. If the head of the femur is positioned abnormally, the acetabulum can form with an angulated roof that slopes upward. This can lead to increased pressures on the cartilage of the hip as well as a persistent tendency for the femoral head to slide in and out of the hip with daily activities. This mechanical problem leads to a greater tendency to develop arthritis in middle age.(See Figure 1 )

In younger patients, this abnormality can lead to increased pain in the hip as well as tears of the labrum. When this condition is diagnosed in adulthood and the hip is still in the non-arthritic phase, there is still a chance to intervene prior to full blown arthritis. Standard radiographs only show the damage in its final stages. Newer types of studies such as MRI (See Figure 2) can show early damage to the structures in the hip.

Periacetabular Osteotomy

The most successful, safe, and predictable of these operations is termed the "periacetabular osteotomy", also called the "PAO". It was developed by two ingenious surgeons, Professor Reinhold Ganz and Dr. Jeffrey Mast in the early 1980’s. An osteotomy is the surgical division of a bone and periacetabular described the application of the osteotomy "around" the hip socket or “acetabulum”. The procedure involves making a series of angular cuts on the pelvis, separating the hip socket from the pelvis and allowing free rotation of the socket in three dimensions. It has proven to be one of the most effective surgical procedures in the treatment of hip dysplasia in adults. The major advantage of the procedure is the flexibility of placement of the hip socket in essentially any position and the preservation of the stability of the pelvic ring. The ability to freely position the hip socket gives your surgeon the ability to customize the correction of the anatomy to the specific deficiencies of that pelvis.

Advantages of PAO
After PAO, patients can bear weight much earlier than with other procedures and females who undergo the procedure can have normal future vaginal deliveries rather than requiring a Cesarean section.

Recovery After PAO
Most patients require hospitalization for 3 to 4 days and can get up with physical therapy on the day after the procedure. Crutches or a walker are usually continued for 6 weeks until there is some evidence of healing of the osteotomy site. After the 6 to 8 week mark, if there is evidence of healing of the osteotomy site on the xrays, patients can resume weightbearing. In many cases, they may have some slight muscle weakness which responds well to physical therapy. By three to four months, nearly everyone walks without a cane. The most gratifying part of the operation is to see patients return to high level activities and occupations without even thinking about their hip.

Potential Complications After PAO
Although the PAO is a relatively major hip operation, in many ways, it is the safest in the long run. The biggest risks are from damage to the nerves, arteries, or veins that run in the pelvis. This risk is minimized by performing all the cuts with full xray guidance in the operating room as well as extensive experience with the operative procedure.

Soloist

2011-09-26T21:29:00.001-07:00

We just had the primary program at church. In our church the kids stay with their family during Sacrament meeting (which is usually a mix of survival and semi-organized chaos on our pew), followed by two hours of primary (kids are ages 3-11). The first hour they meet with the junior primary (3-7) where someone is assigned a prayer, scripture and talk followed by a teaching activity and singing.

Danny has taught Scott to sing loud so that is what he does. Tyler is starting to sing at home more. Today Tyler asked to sing I am a Child of God in the car for a friend. It was cute. Tyler is working on staying out of trouble and often bribed with candy to listen and behave in Primary.

So the primary program is a combination of the kids giving small teaching roles about a topic followed by a song on that theme. As soon as Tyler saw Pop and Grandma he abandoned his class up front and came to sit with us, which is fine. Someday he will sit in primary. Last year Scott would rarely sing when the Primary sang in church. He was too scared and usually stayed with us in the audience. He maybe sang once as a sunbeam and it was a scary experience. It didn't bother me. Danny thought he should go up, but I believe that a kid will be ready when they are ready. I guess we make a good team in finding a middle ground.

Well, this year Scott had a solo in the program and did awesome. He likes to remind me that he was one of the two soloist. He feels so good about himself and special. I love that.

When they first asked I didn't know if he would do it, so I asked Scott and he said yes. I realized the worse that would happen is that he wouldn't sing which would have been no big deal. He sang a verse of Book of Mormon Stories all by himself in front of the entire congregation with confidence and his cute little Scott voice. He did so great and everyone has been telling him how great he did. Today someone asked him if he would do a solo at the Christmas concert. It is so amazing to see how much a child can grow in confidence in just one year and the blessing of having so many supporters behind you. If a child is given the opportunity to do something when they are ready, it can have such a positive impact.

There are so many things I am grateful for in our church and one of them is Primary. Our kids have loving teachers who are so Christ-like. They learn about our Savior. Meet great friends. And it gives them the opportunity to learn to speak in front of a small, supporting audience. When kids turn 12 they speak in front of the congregation and I am always so amazed at how well they do. I never went to primary and can see what a blessing it is for these little ones lives. Thank you to all the Primary Teachers and workers who are impacting our kids!

The VERY BEST Day of Kindergarten

2011-09-26T20:45:00.000-07:00

Scott got in the car after kindergarten beaming. He got to do the share bag or pick something to share with the class. He chose the Bandit, his RC car. He told the class he got it at Tower Hobbies, keeps it in the garage and drives it a lot with dad. The teacher let him drive it on the black top which was "SOOO cooool"! He said he went so fast that rocks were flying and the entire class was cheering and yelling for him.

He loved it and kept saying, "Day 40 was the very best day of Kindergarten." When I asked how he knew it was day 40 he said, "the President of the school (aka Principal) Mr. Jones counts the days and puts up a new number each day with a special key".

As soon as he got home he called dad to tell him about his great day and drew a picture so that he would never forget. This is the first year that he actually likes to draw. In the past he would just draw when assigned and now he actually likes it. Pretty fun to see how their interests change with time.

Yeah for loving Kindergarten. He is so excited to go and I couldn't be more grateful. In bed tonight he said he can't wait to finish painting a house he didn't get to finish today. I love that he looks forward to school the next day. I was a stressed out kid and didn't love the elementary years, was totally lost in middle school and grew to love learning and school in high school and college. I hope he loves the process of learning.

He is so into coloring up at school and so happy to tell me he colored up to the top today that he really wanted to make a color up chart for home. We will see if I can actually stay on top of doing it. We have chore charts that Scott really likes even though I often forget to put the pins on the accomplished tasks. At the end of a period I just reward him with what I think he earned in his allowance. At least the concept is motivating Scott. Now I just need to do better at implementing.

General Conference

2011-09-24T20:54:00.000-07:00

I love General Conference. I am no longer in the season that I could sit and absorb every message, but it is a good season I am in. The bits and pieces of the messages that I hear resonate within and I recognize all the things I am doing well and can do better. I leave a better person, awaiting the next conference in six months.

So tonight was the relief society meeting which was so good. Some points I really liked was how importanat it is to be a visiting teacher. I love the two woman that I visit teach. I have grown to love so many woman who have visit taught me and who I visit teach. I loved when they said it is really about the depth of charity. There is such a difference when visiting teaching is about loving and caring someone compared to making sure you get in a visit each month.

Another point I loved was about charity. When I was in the Northgate ward I had the blessing of being in compassionate service. I have had that calling twice now and absolutely love it. Probably my very favorite calling. While Scott was at school, Kira, Tyler and I would go and visit people and I loved it! We got to know so many wonderful sisters and were filled with the Spirit. My family will be the recipients of service for the next three months while Danny has a major surgery followed by Tyler. I now serve within the walls of my home and recognize how wonderful it is to have the ability to serve and blessings of family and friends who serve. Nothing fills you quite the same.

Someone said something along the lines of helping others makes our own difficulties seem easier. It is so true. It is humbling to go and serve and recognize how many people have some really difficult paths they are asked to walk. It always make me realize all the little things in my life that we are so very blessed for. The thing that I feel so blessed for is the Lord has placed these incredible woman in my life that go through trials I could never imagine yet never complain and find total happiness amidst their struggles because their relationship with the Lord. I thank the Lord for placing these incredible woman in my life who give me perspective and really help me enjoy and recognize the many blessings we have.

Elder Uchdorf gave a great talk about finding the best ways to spend our time. So often we focus so much on things that don't need to be focused on. I think I do a pretty good job of simplifying life but can do a better job just filling my time with the best things. I loved that he said something like "If we spend our days waiting for the beautifulroses, we could forget the forget me nots that surround us. Don’t close your eyes to the simple andelegant beauties to each days." Danny and I often talk about how blessed we are that we are happy people. Much of it is finding the day to day beauties in our lives. There really are so many when you look for them!!

Great meeting. I hope that we can watch next weekend in the hospital. Danny will be drugged up and sleeping but I will just be sitting. I will bring my laptop just in case their is service. If not, we will have plenty of downtime the next couple of weeks.

The Toy Skeleton

2011-09-24T16:57:00.001-07:00

So in kindergarten they have coloring up/coloring down. When the kids do something well they get to color up or make an unwise choice they get to color down. If you color up 3 times you get to choose a prize and if you color down 2 times you get a time out. Scott usually likes to tell me how he colored up and earned his prize, but Thursday was different. Scott told me that night that he skipped a color when coloring up so he could get his skeleton. I was sad he chose poorly and at the same time even more proud that he decided to tell me and make things right.

So we discussed that I was proud of him for telling me, that we all make mistakes and the main thing is that we learn from them and make them right. The whole process of repentance and forgiveness is what we are all here for, right? I said he should probably tell his teacher what he did and give back the skeleton since he really didn't earn it. He was so scared and sad and disappointed in himself.

He always wants to be his best self and is hard on himself when he makes mistakes. He never needs to be told to go into a timeout just goes himself. So he wrote the teacher and a note and wanted to say, "I am sorry. Hate Scott." He thought his teacher was going to hate him. Oh that just broke my heart. I told him she would be so proud that he recognized his mistake and wanted to change it.

Time for a prayer as to what to do and how to teach. We turned on Lds.org and listened to some great talks on forgiveness. Stories of mistakes that prophets and others made and how they received forgiveness and moved on. I LOVED them. Hopefully Scott got something out of it as well. We went to school. Scott was so nervous. He handed over the toy said sorry and I explained what happened. His teacher was so grateful and proud of him and Scott really earned the toy back by the end of the day. We talked about the difference he felt of really earning it and not really earning it.

I fully recognize that parenting gets harder with age. I am enjoying all my time with the innocence of my children and praying I make it through the teenage years when the decisions and mistakes become a little more serious and harder than coloring up one too many spaces.

I was talking to a friend about a talk about parents being at the crossroads. This is the blessing of being able to be at the crossroads. Your children are able to talk and hopefully gain loving guidance to help them through this life that will make them happier more Christlike individuals. What a blessing we had this opportunity to learn.

I am grateful for repentance in my life. I am grateful for the gospel and prayer that teaches us right from wrong. I am grateful that Scott has the most loving, wise and nurturing kindergarten teachers. I am grateful for my kids and the opportunity to learn and grow as a parent and come to know our Savior and Heavenly Father better.

Cardiology Appt

2011-09-24T11:10:00.001-07:00

Had an echo yesterday. We switched insurance to Danny's work and it was $120 instead of my usual $10...we'll have to look into that for next year. This year Danny and Tyler will max out on their deductables so I don't really care how I pay...$100's at a time or $1000's. Grateful for insurance in our household and that Danny has a job so we can afford to get fixed in our household!!

So the important stuff. Tyler seems to be doing well. His liver/kidney function is doing well so they upped his captopril to 6ml/3x day and lasix to a whopping 1.2ml/2x day from 1ml. His heart seems to be doing well and sats were the normal mid to high 80's after resting. They started in the 70's after walking to the appt so it fluctuates a bit depeding on excercise or the pulse ox. I blame it on the machine to keep me happy.

So the plan is going to UCSF on November 13th and surgery on Nov. 18th. They will keep him on milrinone for a week prior to surgery to tune him up. The goal is to be able to complete his fontan without a fenestration which is done in poor candidates for Fontan. The whole reason we postponed surgery in August was his surgeons fear of having to do a fenestration. Our surgeon said kids with fenestrations generally sat and have the same energy level prior to the Fontan as after Fontan, so if possible, he tries to optimize these kids hearts to eliminate this need. So that is what we are trying to do. I have full confidence in Dr. Azakie. I truly believe that we have one, if not the best pediatric heart surgeons for hypoplasts. All of his kids seem to do remarkably well and we are just so blessed for his wisdom and knowledge and love for these little ones. Trying to optimize his heart function with our prayer team and increased meds so he can sustain a fontan. If the heart is too weak they of course will do a fenestration and we will know that it is all in the Lords hands.

The best part of the appt is watching Beauty and the Beast. I haven't seen it in so long and Tyler loved it.

Tyler Riding Little Bike

2011-09-24T07:13:00.000-07:00

Tyler learned to ride little bike...wahoo! He did great. We moved into a court with perfect driveways. He had one spill but wanted to keep on biking. He threw a fit when we had to pick up Scott and he needed to ride tandem and not his big boy bike. That might have to wait until his heart gets fixed. We celebrated with ice-cream, and yes, Kira likes to sit on the table to eat. Good times. It has been over 100 most days lately. While I roast at the park, I prefer heat over cold so will not complain. Plus, it is an excuse that Scott needs to take care of Kira at the park. So cute! I will bring my camera one of these days and show you Scott's babysitting skills. He learned from the Rajecki's this summer.

Delta Fun

2011-09-21T10:39:00.000-07:00

Friends brought us to this little creek by our home to go fishing. The boys each caught a little fish. Best thing about living at the delta is that you can catch a fish in any body of water. Great little activity on a school night.

We also went to Webster Resort. So fun! I forgot my camera. We got one pic of Tyler closing his eyes on the way over. But don't worry I stole pictures from Tara's blog featuring other families who we love (who weren't there with us might I add) just so you can see what it is like. Thanks Tara...hope you don't mind. Waterfront cottage equipped with a zip line, tons of acreage for the kids to roam and water to play in. They brought the kids tubing and the smiles on their faces were priceless.

Scott's first motorcycle ride

2011-09-20T13:07:00.000-07:00

Scott had his first motorcycle ride on the VFR yesterday. He wanted me to take him to school this way, and he told all of his friends. Look how tightly he's holding on. Good old VFR. I'll probably have to post about it on the nitroblue-investment blog.

A Decade of Coaching

2011-09-17T19:49:00.000-07:00

I started coaching at this pool 10 years ago as a Delta Skimmer. I was a 19 year old that didn't know what I was doing. I relied on the head coach to tell me how and what to teach. He had a family crisis in the middle of the season and I was left to figure things out, which I did and realized that it was a pretty great summer job before heading off to BYU. The following two summers I stayed at BYU to take classes and enjoy school without much swimming and headed off for my mission. I came home from my mission in April and coached for Valley Vista which were fun times. It was a good way to get back into normal life and was the beginning of dating Danny which still makes me smile.

Tangent...we were so young, naive and just soo in love....like when you missed the person after an hour and couldn't wait for them to get home. Don't worry, I still have that same anticipation of Danny getting home (but now its so I can get some help with the kids and have an adult to hang out with). Haha...but in all reality I do love, appreciate and need Danny more now than ever. How grateful I am for him.

So back to coaching. I finished up school and swimming for BYU and came back to a sales job in San Francisco so I could earn some money for our literally growing family. I coached on the side for Aquabears. I was able to coach under an amazing head coach as an assistant to the Senior Group. I actually learned how to coach. I learned how to fix strokes, what to look for and how to inspire kids. Great experience. At the same time I took on the Purple Group which were our 10-13 year olds more or less. Great group. Loved working with kids. Most importantly loved striving to become a better coach and more importantly person as I was doing it.

You learn a lot about yourself as a coach.

I hope that all my kids knew that I cared about them. That I wanted what was best for them. Most of the time I think I did an alright job. I look back on some situations and would have done differently. But that is what life is all about right. If I was the same person and coach when I started as when I ended it would have all been for naught.

I learned that perhaps the greatest thing I can do is be the best example I can be to these kids. Kids go through a lot these days. Way more than when we were kids and sometimes they just need somewhere to tell them they can do or they will make it through. I hope I left a positive example.

I learned to work with parents and perhaps most importantly learned what kind of parent I wanted to become. There were so many parents who were great examples to me. Parents who supported their kids and understand the real objective behind a sport. There were others who wanted the best for their kids just lost sight of what that really is. How easy that is to do. I hope I can take all that wisdom and experience with me as a parent.

I learned to balance family life and work. You get to a point that you can get really busy, really fast doing lessons. It is great money and I LOVE to see kids improve from lessons, but it can come at the expense of having a full time job. One summer I was at the pool and away from my kids too much so I learned to say no. I learned to set boundaries and realize that not only is it ok to say no, but it is a good thing. My family and I come first.

I learned what it is like to work at something and become good at it. I started out as a swimmer who was taught how to coach, to a coach who was mentored by other coaches to a coach who could try new things, invent new ways of saying something or teaching a concept that might just help a kid and see if they worked. It is really cool to do that and see kids get it and improve. I really enjoyed doing lessons the past couple of summers because that is where I could help someone really focus on what they needed to do to improve.

I ended coaching coaching for two teams. I went back to Valley Vista as a rec coach and LOVED it! It gave me some of the excitement and energy that I had lost over the past year for whatever reason. The coaches were all there because they loved the kids and loved doing what they were doing. The parents and board were so grateful. You just want to do better when you feel this positive energy behind you and people cheering you on. It was the perfect place to end my coaching for a season. Somehow I came full circle. Starting and ending with rec and remembering the spirit of swimming that is so fun. Sometimes it is just good to change things up and I am so grateful I did.

So I put my stop watch in my drawer and look at it when I open the drawer and remember the lessons and memories I had over the past ten years. I realize how grateful I am for the opportunity and experience to have such an amazing part-time job. I now enter a different stage of life as a truly full-time stay at home mom. I am grateful I am able to stay home with my three little kiddos. It is time. I wouldn't change that for the world and am so grateful to my husband for getting an education and working hard to support our little family. I also recognize that we are very fortunate to have work. I recognize that there are so many out there that would do anything for work and part of me feels bad for even writing that I am able to stay home. But for the time 100% of my focus can be on them and that just feels right and I feel so blessed.

Here I am at the beginning of my coaching with Scott on my lap and ending of coaching with Scott on the blocks...

Pre-Kindergarten Years

2011-09-12T22:27:00.000-07:00

I was asked by a new member of my old ward how I liked the Northgate Ward. I said that there could not have been a better Pre-Kindergarten ward for me. I feel so blessed when I think about the past two years I spent in the Northgate 1st Ward.

There is this small window you have in life when your oldest is old enough to have good friends, enjoy parks, museums, etc without being tied down to school. Those magical years start around 2 or 3 and end when they start kindergarten.

During those years I was surrounded by about 10 women who were in the same boat. I loved them, I loved their children and perhaps even more importantly they loved me and my children despite our weaknesses. Or my children's poopy underwear accidents that they needed to clean.

Everyone was unique, welcoming and full of love. Everyone was always willing to serve each other because they cared. While I had built in babysitters most of the time, I could call any of my friends and they would help with small and large requests whenever needed. I love when a friendship gets to the point that you can stop by unannounced and serve on a as need basis. That is the absolute best. And we had that. It was such a neat group that I will forever cherish

We did Saturday night co-ops that the kids could get together and play and us parents would have 2 saturdays to go out and date.

We did joy schools.

We did park days every Wednesday.

Running club on Saturday mornings.

Fieldtrips and kids running club in the summer.

Music time.

Parties and get togethers galore....Half of which I missed that were always at night when I worked.

The absolute best part of being a mom is being with other moms in your same boat. I was also blessed with friends whose house I would stop by and they would reach for the treats, give me mom wisdom, heat their pools, pick fruit with my kids and play with my kids who were well out of this stage of life. So blessed!

Everyone said to enjoy these years because it changes when kids start school and I am proud to say that I enjoyed them to the fullest. Most of that was because I was blessed with friends that were the absolute best! What a magical time of my life. A time that I will always hold close in my heart and cherish.

So I pass onto others that are still in this stage of life to enjoy it! It truly is the best! And now I am onto another stage that I know I am going to enjoy just as much. The elementary years. They come with different challenges, growth and triumphs and I want to be able to proclaim at the end of the next stage of my mommy journey that I enjoyed these years to the fullest as well. Kindergarten blog post coming soon but as for now night night.

Remember, I do have to get up early, have my kids actually dressed, breakfast fed, lunch packed, piano practiced, site words reviewed, Scott to a friends house and my other kids to music class earlier than I would like. Let the fun begin!

THANK YOU TO ALL MY Northgate Friends....I LOVE YOU!!!

Tyler's Thoughts

2011-09-12T21:45:00.000-07:00

So I was looking at a friends baby on facebook and Tyler wanted to see pictures of him as a baby. He loved seeing himself as a baby. Especially when Pop was holding him. He loves his Pop. He explained to me how cute he was. He explained that they fixed his heart in some. He learned about the feeding tube that he went home with and how some kids need help eating in the beginning so their body can get stronger. This is the only one he didn't like explaining, "That is really mean of them to put me in a box." I told them that they needed to take him across the bridge to a new hospital and the box made sure he was safe to which he replied, "that way I was able to go under the ocean and see the fish in my box." Made me laugh to which I said, "how cool is that?"

It is always hard to know how much to explain to the a child or show them. I don't think Tyler ever saw himself as a baby in the hospital. Child Life Specialists brought a doll and fake hospital bed, etc into his room prior to his surgery and asked if Tyler would be more at ease with them explaining things. I knew his DS would make him the most at ease. He is not one to want to learn about what is going to happen to him while in the hospital. This ended up be a great way, removed from the hospital and needles to show him all the nurses that helped him and how they helped his heart. He loved seeing people visit and hold him and asked questions and loved seeing himself as a baby. How I love living by the spirit. Sometimes you just know what is right for your child and how to teach them.

Maybe

2011-09-12T08:53:00.000-07:00

Tyler: "Can I play your iphone?"
Me: Did you brush your teeth?
Tyler: Yes.
I look at Heidi, who shakes her head. Tyler sees this and says, "Maybe."

tyler's birthday weekend

2011-09-10T14:08:00.000-07:00

Tyler turned four on September 4th. We had dinner at the Bogners.

Ryan pulled the kids in this garden wagon for like an hour and the kids wanted more.

Steve, Leah, Laurel and Ryan were in town with their kids.

On labor day we went to the Fun Fest at Heather Farm Park. It was roasting hot but we had a good time.

My favorite part was the bmx bike show. The jumps are harder than they look, but boring unless they are doing backflips. Those were cool. One kid did a front flip, which was even cooler than a backflip. I didn't see any kuwaharas, though.

Then we had cake and burgers at Pop's. Happy birthday, Tyler!

Camping

2011-09-08T22:24:00.000-07:00

Labor Day isn't official without camping. I am such a last minute planner and decided to go camping on Wednesday, 2 days before the crazy 3 day weekend. That means 0 spots left at most places. I refused to go anywhere without a lake or river to play in the next day since it was supposed to be 100. We got the last spot at Del Valle and had a great time camping on Friday night and playing on the rock beach, warm lake and shaded grassy area on Saturday. I always say that next time I will actually plan and get a group of friends together but never do.

It all worked out because when I went down to the beach, I set down my stuff and heard my name. Friends from the NG ward were right next to us. It was great that Scott and Tyler got to hang out with Henry all day. Especially great when Tyler took a 2 hour nap and Scott still had a playmate.

McMillan tips to Easy and stress free camping = 1 night stay, foil dinner and cereal breakfast, RC cars for entertainment, less than 1 hour drive and swim suits for a change of clothes. I do wish we brought sweatshirts and enough sleeping bags and an air mattress for comfort but it all worked out...Can you tell I am not a hardcore camper. The weather was perfect and we had a great time.

Swagger Wagon

2011-08-30T21:05:00.000-07:00

We got a minivan! Yeah, it's so dope! We call it the Swagger Wagon. A 2008 Toyota Sienna 8-seater. Heidi was on kelly blue book instead of craigslist, and she saw this unusually low-priced van at a dealership in Pleasanton. She called to ask why it was so cheap and it was something about how it had sat on the lot for 60 days without selling and needed to be moved to another lot or dumped at a loss.

We went to the lot about two weeks ago and I strolled in, saying that I was a buyer.

"A buyer? What, you buys cars?"

"Yes. For my client."

We go out to check out the van and Heidi and the kids joined us. The salesperson learned that my client was Heidi, but I make him fire up the engine and I listened to it with the steth. I check out everything, and when I opened the rear door, there was a strange grinding sound.

I asked the salesperson about it and he panicked, trying to get the door to behave. Then he slams it shut, and we can't get it open from the outside.

So I low-balled him: "The timing belt hasn't been done, and that's a thousand bucks. Also, the door is broken. Let's see," I pull out the iphone and look it up, "these guys on the internet say it's $650-750."

He took my low offer and we drove it home that night. Yeah, minivans! It is way more powerful than Heidi's car. It's a 3.5 VVTI v-6 and has a built-in 8 inch subwoofer. Not exactly a Pioneer twelve, but maybe, just maybe, it's good enough.

The kids love it. Especially the built-in DVD player. I like that it's powerful and does better on gas than Heidi's dog ford. I fixed the door tonight with a specially ordered part from the dealership, and you can read about it here.

The deal gets better. I made them call the dealership who did the 80,000 check-up to see if the timing belt was done. They said that everything else was done but for some reason the timing belt was not done. I told them that is necessary and deducted the amount. They did it. Anyway, when we got home I looked into getting it done and turns out that the 2007 models and up no longer use timing belts which are expensive and need to be replaced every 80,000 miles. They upgraded to chains that go way longer. Pays to do your homework for older generations and not the actual car you are going to buy. Innocent mistake that saved us $$$. Woot Woot!

Heidi's favorite features....8 seats! If I was going to buy a car to fit more people I wanted it to fit as many people as it could. I love that I can fit 8 people or fold the entire back seat down and fit my kids in the middle row. I would highly recommend. Play dates and watching others kids have become much easier. DVD player. Blue tooth capability. Remote Control Door Opener. Power sliding doors on both sides that open and close from the comfort of my bottom. Back up sensors. Love it! Feel very blessed and very spoiled.

What a week

2011-08-28T07:56:00.001-07:00

We are still alive.

Tyler wasn't too stoked about having to wear this holter monitor, but we each put on a button to have a contest of who could wear the button the longest.

Luckily, Grammy helped the boys by watching videos with them,

reading to them,

and blowing bubbles with them.

They were over-tired much of the time

Tyler kept getting headaches with his new enalapril

Scott barfed on Thursday and Friday and just wanted to lay around like this

Kira was doing pretty good most of the week.

It was a rough week. But we are happy to have these kids. I am happy to be employed. We love where we live.

Tylers short hospital stay

2011-08-26T09:25:00.000-07:00

Didn't take many pictures because it was a pretty uneventful stay. The ones I took showed that life wasn't all that bad for Tyler. If you look closely you can see that in picture #2 he has cookies in one hand, cracker jacks in the other and a movie between.

The greatest nuisance for Tyler was his IV. Probably because it was irritated from too much DS playing. I did advocate that it needed to be in the least annoying spot while playing. The nurses had never had such a request but I must look out for my little guy, right? he called it his yellow shot because the needle into his arm was yellow. He loved to take off his leads. And went through periods of disliking his pulse ox but for the most part was pretty good. You can tell when Tyler is under stress at the hospital because he doesn't talk much. The first day he maybe said 5 words to others and had a look of worry of what was to come. He was aggravated waking up from anesthesia which is understandable. He wanted to do all this stuff that his little body couldn't and luckily fell back asleep after about 30 minutes of total confusion and slept it off.

Cute moment. Tyler blessed the food one day in his sweet little voice the day of his surgery. He said, " We are thankful for this day. We are thankful for this food. We are thankful for the nurses." Soo cute. The nurse was at the door and overheard and thought it was simply the cutest thing she had ever heard. She told people about it for three days. See, even if these little ones willn't thank a nurse personally for the shots, bp or temps they receive, they are thankful in their hearts.

Pop came to visit the last day and it made Tylers day. He loves his Pop!

Home Sweet Home

2011-08-25T10:58:00.002-07:00

Tyler and I came home yesterday after a shortened 3 day visit at the PCICU aka 7East aka Pediatric Cardiac ICU. Not a bad place if you aren't having major surgery. All of the nurses are wonderful and so nice. They become like family. And the doctors are always there to answer questions, explain things and talk about swimming and kids.

So here is the detailed story. Day 1 Danny dropped me and Tyler off at the waiting room around 6:30. There was no bed in the transitional ICU or ICU so we waited in the waiting room which isn't all that bad. Less anxiety for the little man, quieter and less like a hospital. They brought us up to the 6th floor, got Tyler and mom prepped on his cath and brought him to cath lab within about 30 minutes. Small world, the 1 pre-op nurse and surgeon both went to BYU. Maybe that happens at Primary's, but usually not at UCSF.

Tyler got some verzed (a drug that makes you relax and forget the event which Tyler was enjoying). Got in an IV, got him to sleep and he was ready to go. They debated a coarctation in his PA that was from the Sano Shunt, but decided not to since it would be done during the Fontan. Everything looked good. Pressures looked good. His AV valve was moderately leaky, which we were aware of from previous caths and echos. But his cath surgeon thought he looked good for surgery.

Tuesday morning the surgeons get together to discuss Tyler. There are three main things that they look at prior to Fontan. The first and most important that qualifies a kid is the pressures. If their pressure is too high, the child will not sustain a Fontan and it is a no go. That isn't a great scenario, but can be decreased with meds. Tyler's pressures looked great so that was no big deal. The second thing they look at are other issues, such as leaky valves. His AV valve was the most concerning for Dr. Azakie. He said that he is just about at the 50% mark of Fontan candidates that he sees. That isn't horrible, but also not 100% ideal. So they look at how he is doing at home, what his pre-op med levels were and see if the kid would benefit from more time or would benefit from the surgery. In Tyler's case, he is doing fairly well at home and on a very low dose of blood pressure meds, so Dr. Azakie said that he would like to see if a more reasonable dose of blood pressure meds would help his AV valve and ventricular function.

He said we could probably go forward with the surgery and expect to be in the hospital another week or two or postpone it and see what a higher dose of blood pressure meds would do. His cath surgeon said everyone has their opinions with logic and there is no black or white for this situation. So we are home with increased meds. He is on 5mg of enalapril 2x/day and 1ml of lasix 2x/day. The increased dose of enalapril could affect his kidney so they will monitor that with blood work. He will have a holter monitor and echo this week as a base line and probably be reevaluated in 3-6 months for surgery if everything goes smoothly. It generally takes 3 months for the medication to make a difference. Dr. Azakie felt confident that this would help so we feel at peace about things. He is getting headaches which is not great, but doesn't seem to be dizzy or not tolerating the meds.

Danny gave Tyler a priesthood blessing and it said that the doctors would be confident with his pressures and function prior to surgery, so I have peace and feel good that this is a necessary step to get us there.

People have asked if we are dissapointed. I think it is hard to hear that your child is not the perfect candidate for a Fontan (whatever that means). It is a reminder that your child really does have a MAJOR heart condition and his heart is working really hard. With that, I do realize we are so very blessed to have meds available to Tyler to get him there and doctors that are some of the best in the world for HLHS. They know what is best and I have total confidence in their judgement. I do feel so blessed that if we wanted, Tyler could have received a Fontan. Perhaps not under the optimal condition, but he is a candidate. That is a blessing!

I can't speak for all, but Danny and I have been blessed with experiences in life that make you realize so much is out of our hands and in the Lords hands. Including his perfect timing for things. We had so many people praying and fasting for Tyler that I know that this was very much guided by a higher power and what is best for Tyler. I feel at peace about that and that is all that really matters. We have learned to go with the flow and do whatever is best. With medicine you really don't know what is best from one day to the next. Plans and conditions change and you have to enjoy the now and gain patience.

I think it would be different if Tylers quality of life wasn't very well. I have a feeling these next couple of months are going to be months to relax and enjoy each other before the next major surgery.

Fontan no-go

2011-08-23T17:50:00.000-07:00

The team decided that although Tyler's pulmonary pressures are good, his AV valve leaks too much and they would rather postpone his surgery since now he is only an average candidate. We have to rely on the expertise of our specialists, so we will follow their recommendations and Tyler will likely come home tomorrow on enalapril instead of captopril. Good, because we never liked that captopril. When I spoke with Tyler on the phone, he just wanted to play his DS. Heidi said that's how he's coped with the stress. Oh, the brave little man.

I was planning on riding the VFR to San Francisco and spending the night with Tyler, but I was throwing up all night. So I'm going to stay.

I spoke with a pediatrician who said that when he's doing a procedure and he's done all he can, he has to rely on God for the rest. I've actually heard that from several surgeons.

Cath good

2011-08-22T11:10:00.000-07:00

Heidi called to say that Tyler did great with his anesthesia and the pressures look good, so they'll do an echo and then plan on doing the Fontan on Wednesday. He got a suite in 7 East. Like old times. Good.

Pre-cath

2011-08-22T08:46:00.000-07:00

Tyler got a blessing last night at Heidi's parents and it was good. All he wanted to do last night was play his DS, and it was getting pretty late. We were scheduled to leave for UCSF at 5:00 am, and Kira barfed at 3:00 this morning.

Tyler wasn't ornery when he woke up, as long as he had his DS. Heidi wanted him to take a little rest, but he said, "I'm not tired!" I convinced her to let him play the DS because he'll be sedated enough later today.

We made good time to the city and check-in was uneventful. He said, "Are they gonna cut my heart today?"

"No."

"Are they gonna cut it yesterday?" He gets yesterday and tomorrow mixed up.

"No."

"Am I gonna get a shot?"

"Yes, a little poke."

He didn't seem scared at that. He just acknowledged it and went back to the DS. Good old DS--the one time we are grateful for it. Thanks to all for your prayers!

Fontan

2011-08-15T08:01:00.000-07:00

Tyler is off to UCSF for his single ventricle completion, the Fontan, next week. He will have a cath on Monday to make sure his pressures are good. After Fontan, blood must flow through the lungs without being pumped by the heart. Therefore children with high pulmonary vascular resistance may not tolerate a Fontan. If pressures look good he will have his fontan completion on Wednesday.

Children, like Tyler, with hypoplastic left heart syndrome have a single effective ventricle supplying blood to the lungs and the body. They are delicately balanced between inadequate blood supply to the lungs (causing cyanosis) and oversupply to the lungs (causing heart failure). The single ventricle is doing nearly twice the expected amount of work (because it has to pump blood for both lungs and body). When they are large enough, and the pressure in the pulmonary arteries are low enough, these children are referred for Fontan.

The Fontan is done in two parts. The first part was done when Tyler was 7 months. The first stage, also called a Bidirectional Glenn procedure and involves redirecting oxygen-poor blood from the top of the body to the lungs. That is, the pulmonary arteries are disconnected from their existing blood supply (e.g. a shunt created during a Norwood procedure, a patent ductus arteriosus, etc) is taken out and blood redirected. The superior vena cava (SVC), which carries blood returning from the upper body, is disconnected from the heart and instead redirected into the pulmonary arteries. The inferior vena cava (IVC), which carries blood returning from the lower body, continues to connect to the heart. The second stage, also called Fontan completion, involves redirecting the blood from the IVC (inferior vena cava) to the lungs as well. At this point, the oxygen-poor blood from upper and lower body flows through the lungs without being pumped (driven only by the pressure that builds up in the veins). This corrects the hypoxia, and leaves the single ventricle responsible only for supplying blood to the body.

The Fontan procedure is palliative, not curative. But in many cases it can result in normal or near-normal growth, development, exercise tolerance, and good quality of life. Patients will eventually require heart transplantation.

We feel so blessed that Tyler has made it thus far doing as well as he has done. The first 8 months were the hardest, at times, not knowing if he would ever make it to this stage. We know that our Heavenly Father has blessed us with this precious time for Tyler to be in our family and teach us and others so much about life, faith and hope.

Several people have asked what they can do. Prayers would be the best. We will be updating our blog during this time so you can see how Tyler is doing. Tyler turns 4 on September 4th and we are hoping he is doing well enough to celebrate in the hospital or even better at home. We will see how it all goes.

Weber, part 2

2011-08-14T20:33:00.000-07:00

I watched my youtube videos to educate myself on how to barbecue.

Used the chimney to evenly prepare the charcoal

My marinated chicken breasts

Tyler's into saying "cheese!" for his photos

Scott doesn't like photos so much anymore

Roasting marshmallows. Mmmm, sugar!

For dinner tonight, I made some flour tortillas. They're super easy, cost effective, and fun for the boys. The recipe is one from cooks.com:

3 cups flour

1/3 cup oil

1 cup warm water

1 tsp salt.

Then I sauteed some garlic, onions and peppers, steamed some corn in the pressure cooker, and made fajitas with the barbecued chicken. It was nice.

Spiders

2011-08-14T08:30:00.001-07:00

Woke up to these arachnids and the kids were intrigued.

Heidi wanted to spray them, but I think they are a good part of the ecosystem.

Tasty morsel.

The macro shots were from my little Canon powershot elph s410.

A toy

2011-08-13T22:08:00.001-07:00

Tyler's Fontan is 8/24 with a preliminary cath on 8/22. Scott was telling Tyler, "They're gonna cut you open and you're gonna bleed!"

I was like, "Scott, knock it off."

Tyler pondered this and said, "Can I get a toy?"

"Yes."

Then Tyler sings, "Ha ha, Scott, I'm gonna get a toy!"

Not awesome

2011-08-13T07:59:00.000-07:00

Tyler, Kira, Scott and I were jumping on the tramp at Pop's house yesterday. They put the nylon parachute tube in there and took turns being jumped in it. Once, I popped Tyler pretty high and he must have landed on his head because he shouted,

"Daddy, that was NOT AWESOME!"

I laughed and laughed.

Cub Scouts

2011-08-12T09:50:00.000-07:00

I have entered the world of cub scouts as a committee chair (no idea what that really means). I am excited to learn something new and most importantly get to know all the cubscouts and their families. I think my job is staying organized which I am not good at and delegating which I like to do.

Yesterday was roundtable when all the leaders get together to plan and discuss the upcoming month and events. Scouting is an interesting world. There are people that are meant to be scouts. They entered the scouting world 40 years ago as a youth and are still in it. I love that. I love that they love what they do.

They start telling us we all need to go to wood badge (I think must be somewhere in the woods where you earn badges, tie a forward knot (hopefully its the knot I learned in 1st grade) and involve parents (YES! I can do that and understand the lingo!) So I left after 90 minutes because Danny was still at work at it was past 9PM. The church has gotten really good at condensing meetings but round table is not one of those meetings. Perhaps this is the round table way. I will tell you how the next one goes. Even better I will implement what I learned to involve everyone and send a different leader each month so we are all involved.

Weber

2011-08-08T12:11:00.000-07:00

Finally got my barbecue! I was combing craigslist for months and found the 22.5" Weber grill and cover for a great deal. Mike and I picked it up and then on Saturday, we bought our food at Winco (a separate post is needed for Winco's greatness) and lit the charcoal.

Scott was interested in the new bbq.

The burgers were good. The corn was a fail. I wasn't as good at barbecuing as I thought. I should have watched my youtube videos before, because I didn't add enough charcoal and didn't position it correctly in the kettle. But I bought a charcoal chimney from wal-mart and now I'm prepared for the next round of barbecue. Also, we went to la Huasteca for some carne asada, but they had closed! D'oh!

After we ate, the boys and I put some wood in and roasted marshmallows. It was a good night.

Tie-Dye Project

2011-08-07T09:07:00.000-07:00

For Spirit Week at Valley Vista the kids did Tie-Dye. Here they are at home rinsing the shirts and undoing the ties. Very fun and easy project!!

Kindergarten at Krey

2011-08-01T21:06:00.000-07:00

Scott had his first day of kindergarten at R. Paul Krey (DDS) elementary. We all rode bikes to the school, met his teachers, and got him checked in. He was excited to be there, and I was glad, because I think I cried on the first day of school.

After a brief orientation, Tyler, Kira and I played on the swings while Heidi discussed administrative stuff for Tyler.

Brentwood has nice parks. We are happy to be here.

League meet

2011-07-31T10:11:00.000-07:00

Scott finished his season at Valley Vista by competing in the League meet at Los Medanos College in Pittsburg, CA. Swimming has been for Scott because of the friends he's made. A meet goes like this:

play

swim

play

swim

We are not intense swim parents. I don't even know how fast a fast time is. I'm just glad Scott has benefited socially from Valley Vista Swim Club.

The kids love to tend Kira

Scott was stoked about the tent. It worked great until the sun came out, and then it became a furnace.

Scott and Kai building a lego ship

Tyler hanging out in the tent

Matt and Aly were good to our kids.

Walnut Country meet

2011-07-24T08:07:00.001-07:00

Scott had a great meet on Saturday at Walnut Country, Concord, CA. His relay got first place and he got several personal best times. Go, Scott!

First Day of Soccer

2011-07-20T07:52:00.000-07:00

Scott started soccer and had a great time. He is so serious and a little anxious when he starts something new. He is on a 6/U team with kids at Krey Elementary. They practice T/Th for 45 minutes and he has two great coaches. The best part is that the field is walking distance to our home. The 9 kids are all so cute as they learn to play. Nobody volunteered to be the team mom so I did. Go TIGERS!!!

Walnut Creek City Meet

2011-07-12T17:44:00.000-07:00

Scott experienced his first City Meet. Fun times! You have the rec teams from Walnut Creek race each other. Scott had a lot of fun. He won the B division in free which he was so excited about since it came with a medal. He was so excited to hang out with and cheer for his buddy, Kai. He experienced his first clerk of the course. I love the expressions of the 6&Unders. They all look so scared. Great time, great friends, great swims and of course lots of candy packed into a day. The kids swam great and Cudas got the gold!

BESTS of "Lago de Los Pinos"

2011-07-10T09:36:00.001-07:00

Tyler's favorite activity....HOT TUB. He actually learned how to swim on top of the water in the hot tub this week. Yeah. Now I just need to get him to do it in the pool. That is my goal for the summer.

Best Dessert...Lindsey made this yummy arroz con leche. It was soo good. She is such a talented chef.

Favorite Kids Dessert...Otter pops. I think we went through all 100.

Best Educational Experience. The Gold Mine. Grateful for my job as a coach.

Most Tired...Tyler! Unfortunately lack of sleep means added tantrums and whines. I still think that it is worth all the fun you can jam into a day with cousins.

Best Movie...Cars 2.

Most Patriotic Moment...4th of July Parade. Planes flying overhead. Kids catching Candy. Motorized Sofa. Fireworks at night.

Best Game...Some game that David's neighbor invented that has you lead a ball around certain obstacles..

Best cuisine....Crawdad Dinner caught by the kiddos. They had so much fun catching these creatures and even dared to eat them. Brigham and Jades face is priceless!

Best Craft...Stevens Scavenger Hunt! We were all in charge of a craft and this one was the very BEST!! It started in the morning with the kids chasing Adam around the house and yard as he was making the map. So fun and ended at night with them finding the clues. It was so fun! The kids had a blast working together to find their treasure chest!

Best Part...Hanging out with family and building relationships. I am blessed with great in-laws. My kids are blessed to be with there cousins. I am so excited that after Tyler's surgery we will be able to visit Utah more and continue to build relationships. Right now we only go to Utah once a year and Tyler stays with my parents. As soon as his surgery is over, we can go whenever we want. Scott loves hanging out with Jade, Tyler and Brigham are so cute together and I think Lily and Kira are going to be little buds. My kids talk about their cousins for months after our yearly McMillan vacations and nothing compares. That was the highlight of the trip for me.

Lake of the Pines

2011-07-09T07:09:00.001-07:00

We spent six days with my folks and sibs at the Lake of the Pines resort near Auburn, CA. We rented a home on the water and had a great time.

I have never seen my dad so motivated as when he fishes. This time, he got a big payback in the form of a 2lb largemouth bass.

Heidi did an open water swim alongside our craigslist raft

Kira fell asleep in the tube

Adam boiled some crawdads he had caught. Hey, everything tastes good when cooked in butter and salt!

Scott wasn't a fan of the boiled crawdad.

The best picture I've ever taken of the kids!

A not-so-relaxing lunch at a Mexican restaurant in Auburn

We Moved

2011-07-08T22:24:00.000-07:00

We were going to move 2 years ago but needed to figure out some life lessons. Danny considered specializing so we lived at my parents to get out of debt. Plans changed and Danny found a practice he loves with the highest of standards, great patients and great community. He rides his bicycle to work which takes 5 minutes and loves it. It only took two years to figure this out, which in retrospect is really no time at all. Some people never figure out what they want to do. We feel so blessed! I am so proud of Danny and the journey he is on.

In the meantime, my parents graciously turned their house over to my kids and family and we were the recipients of extreme kindness and love. As a result, my kids have an amazing relationship with my parents, we saved money, and had time to figure out our future. I learned patience, humility, reliance on the Lord, reliance on others, submissiveness, love of my family, ward and friends and so much more. I came away a better, more refined person learning little and big lessons along the way. It wasn't always easy and there were definite times I wanted and needed my independence and space, however, am grateful that our lives don't always go as planned and I had this time to grow as a family and individual. I have the most amazing family and friends and will cherish the time I had at my parents house and in the Northgate 1st ward.

It is amazing how everything has fallen into place. Danny's job, a perfect little house for us and a community we adore. We are excited for our future in Brentwood. Our neighbors are so welcoming. Life for me is still split between Walnut Creek and Brentwood. I am in Walnut Creek about 80% of the time. I leave every morning for work in WC and don't get home until night, so the moving process is a little slow and I am not at all familiar or a part of this community, but look forward to that in the fall. So far I love everything about Brentwood. Everything is new. It has great schools, a ton of kids live on our street, there is a great LDS community, it is affordable and people are friendly. So if you are looking for a place to move, come and visit and be our neighbor!

Here are pictures of a huge truck we rented. I spent the month of May packing boxes, the Elder's Quorum took about 30 minutes loading them up in WC and 30 minutes unloading them in Brentwood and here we are. It has been over a month and there are still things that we need but no time to get settled with our busy schedules. I only had one mental breakdown the first week I was in Brentwood. I was trying to unload and clean a filthy house, worried about my commute and swim schedule and majorly sleep deprived. I missed three weddings in two weeks, and a fun Delta birthday party, but it has all worked out far better than I could have ever imagined. There is a time and season for all and right now is swim season. There is not much time for anything else during swim season but that is alright. We are all loving it and that is all that matters. Here is my cute family on moving day. I love them!

Summer

2011-06-28T21:44:00.001-07:00

Heidi doing her thing. I'm glad she's wearing that hat.

Scott during 'cuda practice

Cap'n Crunch for breakfast

Tyler didn't feel like smiling

Sweetie pie Kira. At church, she just wanders around, smiling and talking to people. We're not sure what she says, though.

Tyler was up way past his bedtime. He wanted to hang out with me while I posted on the blogs. Then, he climbed under the rug because he was cold, and fell asleep.

Mr. T goes to the dentist

2011-06-26T17:27:00.001-07:00

Tyler had some work done by his friendly dentist: his dad. He did better than I expected but there were still some tears. Scott still maintains that he has my teeth, while Tyler has Heidi's. Well, he's right. But Tyler also has a vicious sweet tooth. So does Heidi.

Valley Vista

2011-06-19T20:00:00.002-07:00

I am coaching the 8 & U at Valley Vista. It is actually a lot of fun! Tyler and Kira go to Kids Club, Scott hangs out at the pool for the 7-8 workout and swims during the 6&Unders. It has been a great experience for all the kids and me. I love the kids and the other coaches I work with. Overall great summer thus far. It has really helped Scott become independent. He needs to go and find friends to play with during practice or meets and take care of himself while I am working. Anything social for Tyler is great. Kira is getting used to being without mom. Scott did great at his first meet Sat. morning. I can't believe he knows how to swim. He is growing up so fast. I am so proud of him. He enjoys everything about it and I couldn't ask for anything more.

Doesn't he look professional....

Think again...And THIS is why I LOVE coaching 6&Unders. They always make you laugh. I think this picture sums up our practices and meets. He actually can now dive thanks to Aaron.

This is what his free and back look like. This pic happens to be free.

His Numero Uno Cheerleader....I love this girl so much. Her hair is always kind of out of control. I need to do a better job doing something with it. I pretty much need help with little girls. At least she still loves me.

Speaking in Church

2011-05-29T20:52:00.000-07:00

Heidi and I spoke in church today. Here are our talks. Mine:

3 Joseph Smith, the Prophet and Seer of the Lord, has done more, save Jesus only, for the salvation of men in this world, than any other man that ever lived in it. In the short space of twenty years, he has brought forth the Book of Mormon, which he translated by the gift and power of God, and has been the means of publishing it on two continents; has sent the fulness of the everlasting gospel, which it contained, to the four quarters of the earth; has brought forth the revelations and commandments which compose this book of Doctrine and Covenants, and many other wise documents and instructions for the benefit of the children of men; gathered many thousands of the Latter-day Saints, founded a great city, and left a fame and name that cannot be slain. He lived great, and he died great in the eyes of God and his people; and like most of the Lord’s anointed in ancient times, has sealed his mission and his works with his own blood; and so has his brother Hyrum. In life they were not divided, and in death they were not separated!

These words were written by John Taylor, a witness to the martyrdom of Joseph Smith, as accounted in D&C 135:3.

Joseph’s story is quite a remarkable one. As a youth in the days of religious buzz, Joseph was confused about which church to join, as they all seemed to differ on certain matters. I encountered this same confusion when researching Joseph Smith on wikipedia.

As Joseph sought God’s help in deciding which of the churches was correct, he read in the Bible, book of James, chapter one, verse five: If any of ye lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally.” Joseph went to a nearby grove to pray and ask Heavenly Father which church to join. Since the Lord doesn’t condone confusion, Heavenly Father and Jesus visited Joseph Smith, giving him instructions on what his mission was to become. During that visit, Joseph learned that
1. Heavenly Father and Jesus were different persons.
2. Heavenly Father and Jesus had bodies in the form of man’s.
3. None of the churches at that time was entirely correct.

From that point on, Joseph was vehemently persecuted. He writes, in Joseph Smith History 1:

22: I soon found, however, that my telling the story had excited a great deal of prejudice against me among professors of religion, and was the cause of great persecution, which continued to increase; and though I was an obscure boy, only between fourteen and fifteen years of age, and my circumstances in life such as to make a boy of no consequence in the world, yet men of high standing would take notice sufficient to excite the public mind against me, and create a bitter persecution; and this was common among all the sects—all united to persecute me.
23It caused me serious reflection then, and often has since, how very strange it was that an obscure boy, of a little over fourteen years of age, and one, too, who was doomed to the necessity of obtaining a scanty maintenance by his daily labor, should be thought a character of sufficient importance to attract the attention of the great ones of the most popular sects of the day, and in a manner to create in them a spirit of the most bitter persecution and reviling. But strange or not, so it was, and it was often the cause of great sorrow to myself.
24However, it was nevertheless a fact that I had beheld a vision. I have thought since, that I felt much like Paul, when he made his defense before King Agrippa, and related the account of the vision he had when he saw a light, and heard a voice; but still there were but few who believed him; some said he was dishonest, others said he was mad; and he was ridiculed and reviled. But all this did not destroy the reality of his vision. He had seen a vision, he knew he had, and all the persecution under heaven could not make it otherwise; and though they should persecute him unto death, yet he knew, and would know to his latest breath, that he had both seen a light and heard a voice speaking unto him, and all the world could not make him think or believe otherwise.
25 So it was with me. I had actually seen a light, and in the midst of that light I saw two Personages, and they did in reality speak to me; and though I was hated and persecuted for saying that I had seen a vision, yet it was true; and while they were persecuting me, reviling me, and speaking all manner of evil against me falsely for so saying, I was led to say in my heart: Why persecute me for telling the truth? I have actually seen a vision; and who am I that I can withstand God, or why does the world think to make me deny what I have actually seen? For I had seen a vision; I knew it, and I knew that God knew it, and I could not deny it, neither dared I do it; at least I knew that by so doing I would offend God, and come under condemnation.

We owe a lot to Joseph Smith. Recently I’ve been able to talk about the gospel in work settings. A colleague and I were having lunch one day and he said, “There has to be more to life than just making money and retiring.” We talked about how kids give us a new focus and he said he didn’t want to bring kids into this crazy, wicked world. I told him that there has always been wickedness on earth, but we know about it more easily because of the internet.

I told him there was a book that chronicles the rise and fall of civilizations for 1000 years. When things were bad, they looked to God. When they became wealthy, they forgot God and destroyed each other. I gave him the Book of Mormon.

A few weeks ago, he came to my office at lunch and asked, “Are you happy with your life?” Once again, I had to tell him about the church and the “big picture” it gives us.

Many times, people ask me how I know Spanish. I explain that I served a mission for the church in Spain. Once, a colleague from Holland asked me what I believed in. I told him about Joseph’s experience in the sacred grove, and how Moroni buried the plates in the hill Cumorah and Joseph dug them up hundreds of years later. I told him that only by the power of God could such a thing come to pass.

Each of us gains our testimony individually. I was born into the church and never doubted anything I learned in church. In the MTC, one of our teachers challenged us to pray to know whether Joseph Smith really was a prophet who brought about the restoration of the gospel and translation of the Book of Mormon. I took her up on the challenge. In my prayers, I said that I knew Joseph was a prophet, but would the Lord give me the burning feeling that other people talk about?

I felt a tremendous warmth encircle me and I knew that Joseph Smith had been a true prophet and that his work was also true.

Summarize.

Bear testimony.

Heidi's talk:

The bishop asked us to speak on the hymn “A Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief.” I have heard this hymn several times yet never pondered its beautiful message. I am going to focus on what the hymn teaches about service. It shows the steps of gaining a love for service and living a life of consecration.

Verse 1 reads,

1. A poor, wayfaring Man of grief
Hath often crossed me on my way,
Who sued so humbly for relief,
That I could never answer nay.
I had not pow’r to ask his name,
Whereto he went, or whence he came;
Yet there was something in his eye
That won my love; I knew not why.

This first verse teaches us that the very first step of service is having a willing heart. This man was asked to serve and he did. We learn that he didn’t know much about the person he was serving, where he came from or what his name was. He just felt it was the right thing to do. The Spirit that is within each of us gives us this same desire to serve. As we follow that gentle prompting to serve, the desire grows and it becomes easier to serve.

Verse 2 reads
Once, when my scanty meal was spread,
He entered; not a word he spake,
Just perishing for want of bread.
I gave him all; he blessed it, brake,
And ate, but gave me part again.
Mine was an angel’s portion then,
For while I fed with eager haste,
The crust was manna to my taste.

In verse 2, He sacrificed his things for the man. He gave him all he had and in return he was blessed. I love that he was blessed with Manna, the bread of life. I know that when we serve, the Lord blesses us. I have seen that in my own life. I often visit Gayle Adams with Kira. She loves Kira and Kira loves her. We sit together, sing primary songs, talk about being moms. Last week, we had a wonderful visit and had the opportunity to quickly visit with the others in the home. Everyone loves seeing Kira, holding her and talking to her. When I left, I was filled with love. I was filled with appreciation for such wonderful people in my life. Whether it be a quick phone call, visit, meal or being patient with a child, I am filled with the bread of life.

Verse 3 reads
I spied him where a fountain burst
Clear from the rock; his strength was gone.
The heedless water mocked his thirst;
He heard it, saw it hurrying on.
I ran and raised the suff’rer up;
Thrice from the stream he drained my cup,
Dipped and returned it running o’er;
I drank and never thirsted more.

In this verse, the man was looking for opportunities to serve. He no longer needed to be asked to serve, like in verse 1, but watched out for his friend and didn’t walk but ran to help him. Are we serving just when asked or are we seeking out opportunities to serve? Another lesson I love from this verse is that he not only raised his cup once or twice but said, “thrice from the stream he drained my cup”. When Tyler was in the hospital my mom and Robin Bogner took Scott for me everyday. They could have very well said that they had done there part and served enough, but they wanted this 18 month old boy, whose parents seemed to dissapear overnight to have consistency in his life. How grateful I am that they were willing to serve, doing the same thing time and time again, never complaining or feeling like it was someone else turn to serve.. I know I sometimes serve once, thinking I have done my part as if my part as if service was part of a checklist. As we make service a part of our lives, it doesn’t feel like an act of service or duty but instead a wonderful part of the day to share love with family and friends and to help another.

4. ’Twas night; the floods were out; it blew
A winter hurricane aloof.
I heard his voice abroad and flew
To bid him welcome to my roof.
I warmed and clothed and cheered my guest
And laid him on my couch to rest,
Then made the earth my bed and seemed
In Eden’s garden while I dreamed.

In verse 4, we begin to see the sacrifices that the man is taking to serve. He goes out at night into a storm to find his guest. He begins to care for him emotionally by conversing and cheering him up. What a change from verse 1 when he barely knew who he was serving to verse 2 when he was just taking care of his physical needs. I know that as we serve another, our love and friendship for each other grows. He gave him his couch to rest while he made the earth his bed. Anothers needs are placed ahead of his own.

5. Stript, wounded, beaten nigh to death,
I found him by the highway side.
I roused his pulse, brought back his breath,
Revived his spirit, and supplied
Wine, oil, refreshment—he was healed.
I had myself a wound concealed,
But from that hour forgot the smart,
And peace bound up my broken heart.

In verse 5, we see how much he loves the man he is serving. He takes care of him physically, showers him with his finest things, wine and oil, and shows undeviating devotion to protect and care for him even when it meant putting his own life and reputation at stake. From that moment he forgot the smart and peace bound up his broken heart. Doing what is right isn’t always easy, but ultimately, the Spirit will lift and bless our lives.

6. In pris’n I saw him next, condemned
To meet a traitor’s doom at morn.
The tide of lying tongues I stemmed,
And honored him ’mid shame and scorn.
My friendship’s utmost zeal to try,
He asked if I for him would die.
The flesh was weak; my blood ran chill,
But my free spirit cried, “I will!”

This man was now living a consecrated life. He had given his finest things in verse 5 and now he had given up worldly honor and respect to follow the Lord. His own life if needs be to follow the Savior. This doesn’t happen overnight. This mans love and devotion grew as he served. His willingness to serve evolved into a life of sacrifice, a life of devotion and eventually into a life of consecration. It is a gradual process that we are all undergoing.

7. Then in a moment to my view
The stranger started from disguise.
The tokens in his hands I knew;
The Savior stood before mine eyes.
He spake, and my poor name he named,
“Of me thou hast not been ashamed.
These deeds shall thy memorial be;
Fear not, thou didst them unto me.”

Finally we learn that when we are in the service of our fellow beings we are only in the service of our God.

I encourage everyone to go home and ponder how the Lord would like you to serve. I know he will guide and direct you and give you opportunities to serve.

Last year, I evaluated service in my life and realized that it was very easy for me to give of my time and much harder to give of my things. I decided that I was going to work on that. I prayed and sought opportunities to overcome this fear I had of giving up my possessions. At first this was very difficult, but with time, prayer and repetition it became much easier and has emmensely blessed my life. I don’t have this fear of holding onto things that I really don’t need. As we work and seek after opportunities to serve, we are blessed and recognize the Lords hand in every aspect of our lives.

I think it is also important to realize that the areas we serve change. When Tyler was sick for the first year of his life, Danny and I were recepients of service. We were in survival mode, spending every ounce of energy serving each other and our children. Now that Tyler is a little better, we are able to serve outside our immediate family. It is ok and actually good to say no sometimes. That doesn’t mean we have an unwilling heart, it just means that we are focusing our energy in another area of service.

I have been blessed in my life with people who have taught me the power of love and service. I have been blessed with a family who is the perfect example of service. My mom and dad would do anything for anyone. They were always making meals, sometimes feasts, to help another. It seemed that our spare bedroom always had someone living in it in time of need always accompanied by large meals and a welcoming smile.

They taught me and my sister by example.

This ward family is an incredible example of service. I have had people by my side lifting me in times of need, teaching me in times of ignorance and helping me in times of need.

Just this week, people within the ward have blessed my life. We were supplied with dermabond to repair Scott’s head. We were prepared a fabulous dinner after casually stopping by a friends house. The entire ward came to my rescue in putting together a beautiful funeral luncheon for 100 people in just one day. There wasn’t a person that wasn’t willing to help. Several woman spent their afternoon setting up and serving a wonderful meal to lighten the burden of a family in need. A friend watched Tyler for me on Friday. I was given boxes to move. I was given clothes for my kids. I was told that my child was cute. I was offered babysitting for my kids from several people. I received help unloading furniture from our truck.

As you have each served me in very unique ways, I have been blessed. I have been blessed with increased love and appreciation for each of you. I have been blessed with a lighter load to carry. I have been blessed with knowing that I am not in this alone. I am truly blessed.

As we serve and allow others to serve us, we come to understand the Saviors love. As all of these wonderful men and woman have served me this week, I have come to see them as the Saviors angels here on earth. Never judging my imperfectness or imperfect family, always being willing to help and lift and make my burden lighter.

Fuddruckers

2011-05-29T20:49:00.001-07:00

A family from Aquabears invited us to eat at Fuddruckers this weekend. Good times!

Demolition derby 2011

2011-05-29T20:41:00.000-07:00

The demolition derby was Saturday and it was da bomb! It was raining all the way to Sacramento, but once we got there, it cleared up and was nice! Yeah, it was sweeeeet! Demolition derby!

This year was way better than any other. There were 12 cars in the main event, which lasted at least 15 minutes. It was down to two cars that just kept smashing each other.

We just got a huge bag of kids clothes from craigslist and the boys liked their homie hats.

Earplugs. What?

My family. One of the few family portraits we have.

Gradjumacation

2011-05-27T16:34:00.000-07:00

Scott graduated preschool yesterday. Walnut Acres has been a great experience for him because he has been able to make friends and develop his confidence. Swimming has been great too, but I already wrote about that.

All the graduates lined up along the sidewalk at Arbolado Park, Walnut Creek.

The alphabet phonetic song

Happy grad

Nothing like a hard day's work!

A note to Scott....

Dear Scott,

We are so proud of you, our little graduate of Pre-K (not preschool as you are quick to correct). You have learned and grown so much this past year. We couldn't have found a better program that gave you a love or learning and school.

In the beginning you were shy. You would have us walk in with you and help you get settled. With time, you grew in confidence and life experiences. You learned what it is to be a good friend and find good friends. What a wonderful life lesson. We prayed for friends. After 2 months you would be greeted with a room full of kids yelling Scott, excited to see you and a room full of kids waving and yelling good-bye. You begged to stay longer. You wanted to do P.E, art, dance and loved every minute. Our three hour day sometimes turned into 5 hours. You never wanted to leave. Begging me to let you finish up whatever you were doing and staying longer. You were exhausted at the end of the day. You would come home so tired.

Your days were filled with a variety of things. We usually started at 9:30 when the kids had a little bit of time to play outside. Junior Kindergarten Program

Inside Inside Inside In

You worked so hard at your journal and other things during learning stations. You went from learning to write all your letters so well to beginning to read. You became so much more creative. Your handwriting, imaginative learning, coloring, independence and initiative in things grew. You were always excited to show me what you worked on. Proud of whatever you completed that day.

You loved your teachers. They always had so much fun with you and your class. Yami taught you how to shoot a basketball correctly, John made learning fun, Miss Julie, Sara, Doris and Maria made sure you learned a lot. Justin loved Justin Beaver. Barry and Jaime always greeted you and Tyler with a hug or hello. What a great group of teachers.

They always told me how nice and what a good listener you are. They are all so proud of you and how much you have grown this past year.

You are excited to be in Kindergarten next year. You are going to do great! I am so proud of you. You have a love for learning and friends which is all we could ask for. We found the perfect program for you and are sad that our other children will not be able to attend.

Off to Krey Elementary School next year in Brentwood. You will find new friends and we hope you will have as wonderful as experience as you did this year. We love you and are so proud of you!

Love, Mom and Dad

Junior Kindergarten Program 2010-2011

9:00 Free Play

9:30 Jr K Learning Stations

11:30 Jr K Outside Play

12:00 Lunch Time

12:30 Yoga on Monday, Learning Stations (T/TH) and Rhythm & Dance (F)

1:00 Outside Play or Art Enrichment

1:30 PE

As of late

2011-05-22T20:22:00.000-07:00

Heidi has been on craigslist quite a bit. It has yielded some good results, though, because we got some really nice, sturdy furniture at a good price. I like craigslist because we have met some of the nicest people who are closing the chapter on one part of their lives, like the couple in Piedmont who were sending their daughter off to college. We bought the bed, table, and bean bag. It was premium.

Here's a picture of Scott after his wound was closed with some dermabond and steri-strips.

Tyler has been a good boy lately. He is mostly potty trained, except for his poopy accident at the baby-sitting co-op. Thanks, Sam.

Kira is as cute as a button. She walks around, talking to herself. She looks a mighty awful lot like Heidi, eh?

Young Heidi

Heidi and Heather with their daughters

Paisley and Kira. They appear to be the same size, though Kira is about seven months older.

Demolition Derby!

2011-05-03T08:56:00.000-07:00

The demolition derby is coming to the Sacramento County fair on Saturday, May 28. I just ordered my tickets. I am stoked! Scott is, too. I know we don't have that many readers of this blog, but if you want to come, we would be most happy to have you join us. Put it on your calendars! Bring your earplugs! I should put this on facebook. Okay, bye.

My family

2011-05-02T21:23:00.001-07:00

Finally got to sing happy birthday to Heidi with a cake Walt made

At Heather Farm Park

Scott jumping off the swing